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For anyone that’s only briefly read about how I caught my wife cheating on me intimately online and believes there should be a second chance.

Oh, I did. First time was on this site, Kik, and Skyping starting at least eight years ago. Below is her apology thread to me here seven years ago as well as a gift to me about how she’s going to change to supposedly start our new lives together. That’s actually when we both left this site 7 years ago in December. This time she’s come off all of her anxiety meds starting in January (we first met in recovery for drugs and alcohol 24 years ago and she had always suffered serious mental illness issues,) and she has become incredibly unstable both emotionally and mentally. Around the same time she started coming off of her benzo’s, she started cheating on me again but this time on her Twitter account, where she’s built up a network of fuck boys and girls, the same way she did here. I found about it all two and a half months ago because she was becoming very hostile to me and disconnecting intimately the same way she did eight years ago. She had left one of her old phones out for the school age daycare kids she watches at her home day care to play on while she watches them. It happened to have her Google account on it, which of course showed her entire search history across all of her devices. I had really left her phone and devices alone all this time to choose to trust her but lately in the last few months not only had her behavior changed to what it was like for us eight years ago but on top of that she had been recusing herself alone to the bedroom a lot, supposedly to sleep but she would be awake most of that time on her phone and she was also hiding her screen from me when I’d come in suddenly just like before. She also had started to accuse me of having an online affair a couple months before, same as she had with an in person female coworker that I had eight years ago. It’s just her deflection and trying to ease her own guilt as that coworker was very happily married and I was friends not only with her but also her husband and even went to their house to watch football games with them both. There was never anything going on for me. Because all of this I checked out her phone which she had a recent Google photo where she had made herself up very pretty for a selfie a couple months ago but it was nothing sent to me. It also had her searching the meaning of certain sexual terms and asking what the time it was in Germany. I then found a Twitter profile that she had been on a lot. It was slamming their spouse a lot, had a lot of self harm and end of life ideation, and was very intimately friendly with her regular commenters. I’ve read enough of her writings over our 20 plus year history, that it was clear it was her Twitter profile. That was late in the evening the day before I was off for the weekend, so I approached her the next morning and she freaked out. She denied that she had been doing anything sexual and unbeknownst to me deleted all her PM’s from the account I found and also her alt account that I had not found and I didn’t even learn about until about a week and a half ago. She at first said she was sorry about slamming me but was just an outlet for her when she was frustrated with me and needed to get it out, so she didn’t take it out on me which didn’t quite make sense because she had increasingly become more hostile over small things towards me over the last few months. She offered to have me join Twitter and we could be friends and she could share this part of her life with me same as she had offered on this site, so many years ago but over the next two months her lies all slowly unraveled and we ended up having a fight, where she asked for a divorce. A week and half later I moved out to an extended stay motel because the house had quickly become so toxic that my parents were genuinely worried for my welfare as I will not be violent towards women ever and her Twitter writings hinted towards violence and that’s not a safe place for me to have to try and sleep on our couch while my new apartment opened up this July 3rd. She filed the very next morning after I left at the court house with the do it yourself form and the help of her brother. I believe she was terrified I would make her quit Twitter like we quit SW, so many years ago. She also didn’t feel safe engaging in her cheating activities because I knew about her account and was actively watching for the first time in almost seven years, as well many of her answers about the site didn’t make sense if she wasn’t sexting again and had made me suspect. The last day before I so moved out, I did offer marriage counseling to keep our marriage and she took my work day to consider but said no when I came home, I believe because she would be forced to talk about all her past cheating and her new Twitter account and even if she wasn’t outed again she would most likely be asked to give up Twitter to save the marriage. Her Twitter account had become more important than me, us, our 20 year marriage, and even our family of three children, two just barely adult boys, and one 12 year old minor daughter. So as you can see, the time for reconciliation or second chances has long past and the offer of marriage counseling was truly my last offer to fix our marriage. She broke my heart and I wouldn’t take her back now if she begged. I now have a lawyer and she will have to speak with him outside of anything that is not a direct yes or no question about our daughter or adult children that still live in our house finishing up their college.



These gifts from her are still in the gifts on my profile page here from when we were still trying to reconcile it all after the first round of lies and cheating here on Similar Worlds.
Primnproper · 56-60, F
Well you certainly gave her the opportunity to resolve herself and start a fresh. People with addictions very often have obsessive tendencies and will just go from addiction to addict to something else. You couldn’t have helped her anymore than you did. She needs to find herself again before she can truly commit to anyone else.
@Primnproper Either way, it’s just no longer my concern. Have to move on.
Primnproper · 56-60, F
@ShadowedWhispers yes you do for your own sanity.
decentsoul · 26-30, F
You deserve better 🫂
@decentsoul very kind, ty 🤗
2ndtimeguy · 61-69, M
If she was at a party and got drunk and wound up having sex with someone else can see forgiving that but to intentionally seek out someone to havensex with and to continue its over sorry but went through that.
@2ndtimeguy I definitely understand and am sorry that you also have had it happen to you. ty for the kind words.

 
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