I Have a Question

Do you think that age difference is important when getting married?

LedRobster · 61-69, M

i think this is a complicated question with no "one size fits all" answer." If you have a much older husband, the younger wife may be looking at taking care of an infirm husband at some point or maybe even widowed, which can be especially hard if children are in the picture. The same could be true of a much older wife, but women tend to live a fair amount older than men, so I think it is less of an issue. Disparity in age also brings up the issue of how much they really have in common. Do they share enough commonality to build a common life upon moving forward from the marriage. There is also the issue of differing maturity levels to consider. Is there compatibility there?

We like to believe that "love conquers all," and it can conquer a lot when it comes to a wide age difference. However, the couple should carefully examine the issue from all sides before committing to marriage IMHO.

TexChik · F

@LedRobster: less than 10 years difference, it's love . 10 -15 years difference it's a trophy wife or husband, 15-30+ years difference it's gold digging.

LedRobster · 61-69, M

@TexChik: Okay, gotcha, thanks. I also think a big age disparity between the two can become grounds for resentment on the part of the younger. Example: Established Old Guy marries very Young Woman (maybe woman was looking for a "father figure" at the time?). Old Guy is set in his ways and opinions and will probably experience little additional personal growth. However, Young Woman continues to grow and mature and, at some point, becomes resentful of Old Guy's controlling, fatherly attitude--the same qualities that originally drew her to him. You could flip this and say that a Young Man marrying an Older Woman might eventually be resentful of her achievements and success while he is still finding his way in life. Potential problems galore.