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I Love Poetry

This poem was read to us in Mrs.Sugarman's class in infant school.
And it's stayed with me my whole life !!
I think it's the absurdity I loved, even then !
It's called Bad Sir Brian Botany by A.A. Milne.
Sir Brian had a battleaxe with great big knobs on.
He went about the villagers and blipped them on the head !
On Wednesday and on Saturday. But mostly on the latter day
He called on all the villagers and this is what he said...
"I am Sir Brian. I am Sir Brian !
As bold as a lion !
Take that ! And that ! And that !!
Sir Brian had a pair of boots with great big spurs on. A fighting pair of which he was particularly fond !
On Tuesday and on Friday, just to make the street look tidy, he'd collect the passing villagers and kick them in the pond !!
"I am Sir Brian ! (Sper-lash !)
I am Sir Brian ! ( Sper-losh !)
I am Sir Brian ! As bold as a Lion !
Is anyone else for a wash ?"
Sir Brian woke one morning
And couldn't find his battleaxe !
He walked into the village in his second pair of boots.
He had gone a hundred paces, when the street was full of faces, and the villagers were round him with ironical salutes !
"You are Sir Brian ? Indeed !
You are Sir Brian ? Dear, dear !
You are Sir Brian as bold as a lion ?
Delighted to meet you here !!"
Sir Brian went a journey and he found a lot of duckweed.!!
They pulled him out and dried him then they blipped him on the head !
They took him by the britches and then
Hurled him into ditches !!
They pushed him under waterfalls and this is what they said
"You are Sir Brian, don't laugh !
You are Sir Brian, don't cry !
You are Sir Brian, as bold as a lion ?
Sir Brian the lion, GOODBYE !!!"
Sir Brian struggled home again and chopped up his battleaxe !
Sir Brian took his fighting boots and threw them on the fire !
He is quite a different person now he hasn't got his spurs on.
And he goes about the village as B.Botany esquire.
"I am Sir Brian ? Oh no !
I am Sir Brian ? Who's he ?
I haven't got any title, I'm Botany !
Plain Mr. Botany B

 
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