How much longer until these terrible thoughts go away?

I hope so. So far nothing, though

That explains a lot, actually

I will

Are you asking what I'm talking about, or what?

yeah

It's a mixture of feeling that my good (well, better than the low baseline) mood I'm in will very suddenly disappear and the depression will flood in again, and a feeling of being unwanted as anything more than an acquaintance/friend

Yes. It's what happens once I finally reach a point of not caring about things any more