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Would you dump someone you suspected of cheating?

Even with no solid proof? My gut instincts are usually never wrong
smiler2012 · 56-60 Best Comment
adelh91 you may have good instincts that is fair play but I would always have concrete proof that you can tackle him with then take it from there if cannot give you an explanation then ditch him always give the benefit of the doubt just in case you are wrong
Danez · M
@Adelh91: ya gotta question the dishonesty for sure. and if its nothing then why not tell you the who, what, and why not telling you. if there's no honesty in a relationship (especially a long distance one) then there's not much point to continue it.
AliceMortem · 31-35, F
@DanGerUs: well we do see each other fairly often, and he won't answer the phone around me, hardly texts around me, blows hot and cold. It's like the good times are great, and the bad ones make me feel that I'm wasting my time
Danez · M
@Adelh91: I'd ask.. where do you see this relationship going? do you see a future with this person? Do you think that the way he makes you feel today will get better in the future? Or will it get worse? What do you want out of this relationship? If you aren't getting what you want from it or you don't think it will ever get there then I say to cut your losses and move on. You can either make a clean cut or just put him in the Friend zone. But I get the feeling he isn't giving you everything you feel he should. He doesn't make you feel you can completely trust him. His actions while away leave you doubting his devotion. But you need to decide what you want from him.

I wouldnt be with someone who makes me feel like that.
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Coppercoil · M
@SarahD: 🙄
SW-User
I don't doubt your instincts but I personally would need something more substantial.
AliceMortem · 31-35, F
Well if they're not cheating they're lying about something
SW-User
That's quite possible.
SW-User
if i felt sure enough... trust is everything.. without it there's no point in going any further.
SW-User
simple choice then, use him or lose him..
you don't sound like a user so......
AliceMortem · 31-35, F
@onestarrynight: I'm looking for something real now. Tired of all these games
SW-User
I understand completely...
games are for children.. life's too short.
WhatShallIcallyou · 51-55, M
You don't need solid proof. You are not administering justice but deciding if the relationship is acceptable to you. The only real concern is if there is nothing wrong except your instincts, you may struggle to find a long term partner.
Footballstar · 26-30, M
@Adelh91: first one yeah sometimes I would. Second one yeah you have good days you have bad days. Lie about things that depends do you 100% with proof know he's lying?
AliceMortem · 31-35, F
@Soccerstar: tbh you sound like you want me to be in denial and give him the benefit of the doubt. I have had experience in this before, I know what I'm talking about
Footballstar · 26-30, M
I don't want you to be in denial but I do know that people who have had something bad happen before look for warning signs that aren't there when in similar situations again (in your case a new relationship) . So I'd recommend getting proof before making any rash decisions based on a gut feeling that may turn out to be wrong and negatively affect your relationship
curiosi · 61-69, F
If you are feeling this way then there are deep issues that will destroy the relationship eventually anyway. Get out and find true happiness.
AliceMortem · 31-35, F
I just hope they're not my issues, but he's showing a lot of cheating warning signs
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AliceMortem · 31-35, F
@SarahD: it's great lol
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Peaceful · F
@HairyBallSack1: easy Simba. I didn't call you any names or put you down. ✌🏼️
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Peaceful · F
@HairyBallSack1: I really wasn't. But I guess that's your perception. Anyhow, have a nice night.
SW-User
I can tell if a guy is cheating
smiler2012 · 56-60
adelh91 yes it does sound strange to tell you a blatant lie like that knowing he could be rumbled but again I say to you it is only suspicion you need concrete proof then you can nail him good and proper
Danez · M
No that wouldn't be fair and I'd feel lick such a schmuk if I found out the opposite afterwards
AliceMortem · 31-35, F
No you just know
Danez · M
@Adelh91: Is he being secretive or aloof about things? How is it you know? I mean if things weren't good and there weren't good feelings of trust in the relationship then I might call it quits but not for simply having a feeling. There'd have to be a lot more for me to call it off completely.
AliceMortem · 31-35, F
@DanGerUs: Secretive, hot and cold, won't use his phone near me, lying about being asleep so he can't reply etc
Ynotjenn · F
If you're not married...yep.
Ynotjenn · F
@DanGerUs: Not only that but if you're already wasting your emotional energy worrying about whether or not someone is cheating before you're even married? Pssht...whether he's cheating or not, it's not worth it.
AliceMortem · 31-35, F
@Ynotjenn: good point
Danez · M
@Ynotjenn: couldn't agree more
Footballstar · 26-30, M
Personally I'd want some sort of proof rather than just instinct. Innocent until proven guilty
Coppercoil · M
Depends how good the sex is.
Coppercoil · M
@Adelh91: that's cool.. I'm sure you pretty much can have whatever guy fits your fancy anyway. Take the power back.. kick him to the curb!
AliceMortem · 31-35, F
@coppercoil: I'm not sure about that! I'm nothing special
Coppercoil · M
@Adelh91: oh my.. not true.. but that's sweet. Humbleness is very beguiling.
I think you'd better make sure first. You could ruin a good thing otherwise
CheshireCatalyst · 36-40, M
No you need evidence, get your stalk on!
AliceMortem · 31-35, F
Hahaha! It's not worth my time. I'd rather just forget about him
sleepyhead · 46-50, M
The girl I lost my virginity to cheated on me a year in to the relationship. I knew but had no proof. Waited till we'd been together 2 years then called her on it and found out I was right. Wasted a whle year of my life, aged 18.

Don't waste your life. If your gut is telling you something isn't right, it probably isn't.
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AliceMortem · 31-35, F
@daddybrad49: no offence to him but he's not worth it. I'd rather find someone who actually respects me
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