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I try to help people but it seems to me that most of the times they only care about themselves.

My freind is not very good at saving money. I have been helping him with his finances for a long time, even though we both earn the same income every month. Several times I would buy food for both of us, cook it myself and I would have to do the dishes cause he would refuse to do it or only would wash his own. He still owes me money, I don't even mention it cause I know he won't be able to pay it , regarding the way he deals with his money and other more important debts he has. Last time he asked me for money to buy shoes, I refused it and he called me a grudge (he didn't even say he was kidding😑😑)...i just acted like I didn't hear it. I am done helping him.

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yellowstone

You can't help your friend be more responsible with money. You can however stop rescuing him. Eventually, he will have no choice but to confront his bad choices.

SW-User

Thank you for the advice

yellowstone

@MrMarcus: you're welcome.

Higokian · 26-30, M

I think that is probably the best thing you can do at this point. :/ It's really unfair of him to treat you like that.. but really great of you to treat him so well, regardless of his behavior towards you. :p

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Higokian · 26-30, M

@MrMarcus: I hope that it will get better. It always sucks to lose a friend. :( I hope everything turns out better for you though. :3

SW-User

@Higokian: yea, I also hope things will get better :(. Thank you

Higokian · 26-30, M

@MrMarcus: you're very welcome <3

oneofnine · 70-79, M

There may be people who can help him organise his money better, but he will need to find them for himself. He is not a child and needs to take responsibility in an adult world. Your money is not his. That is the first thing he needs to learn. You are right to decide not to help him any more.

SW-User

Thank you, I am glad you understand

oneofnine · 70-79, M

@MrMarcus: You are welcome.

Mondayschild · F

Sometimes is is a sad thing to deal with. I had to cut my sister off because she was abusing my help and would not take responsibility for her own life. We have to remember that we have our own lives, sounds selfish but we have to survive

SW-User

You're completely, and even if we act selfish, it's not like the abusive people are acting altruistically

Primnproper · 56-60, F

I'm happy to help people but they have to show their willing to help themselves also..

SW-User

That is exactly what I realized, I took a long time though

Primnproper · 56-60, F

@MrMarcus: yep it did me to...you can only do so much, if they won't help themselves they will just continue to take..

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SW-User

I think it's ok now, at least I now know how to deal with it.

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SW-User

@Stereoguy: yea, thanks

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