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I think more than anything I just want someone I can give my heart too.

That I can trust and feel safe around. I know it's not possible or realistic. But I still have that ache.
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You're working against yourself by holding onto the belief of knowing giving your heart to someone you can trust and feel safe around, isn't possible or realistic. There's no way to satisfy that ache you still have with that kind of contradiction going on inside of you.