way too tired

When you care about everyone and nobody cares about you. When you listen intently to the words they say and when it's your turn to talk they immediately go on their phone and you become a less than human POS wall. When EVERYONE bullies and hates u without cause and you want to hate them but u cant because you know you're a bad person and deserve it. 19 years of screaming and violence, 19 years of blood and tears, 19 years of begging ppl i care about to stop hurting each other. 19 years of PAIN AND LONELINESS. 19 years surrounded by suicidal ppl who i desperately want to live when i myself feel like giving up , ppl who dont even care bout me. its a rlly sad world