Do we need to “accept” that we were rejected, after we were rejected, to “heal” the wound?

It’s been 4 yrs and it still bothers me. New unrelated rejections keep pulling it back up too. But how I was rejected is not okay i dont know if I could ever “accept” it like it’s “no big deal”. The memory hurts still....help??

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4meAndyou · F

If you were rejected in a very bad way, it becomes a wound that contains poison. It will heal very, very slowly. The thing is, the human mind either WANTS to forget the really bad things, or it dwells on them...like a toothache, where you can't stop touching the bad tooth with your tongue.

I can tell you, from experience, that you will probably always remember this wound. You are probably deeply angry. And it bothers you.

But you have to consider the source, also. Consider the person who did this to you. Human trash, shallow humans, and nasty, evil humans dish out a lot of pain in this world, and probably don't even care. People like that are narcissists, or might even be sociopaths. Just consider that you have had a very lucky escape.

Remember also, that the evil done to you should never rule you, or ruin your day. The pain will fade, gradually, as your years pass.

I think back to the second ex, now, who used to fill my years with pain, and who messed me up so badly, and I can't even remember how badly he made me feel...because I don't care anymore. It took me 20 years to stop hating him. But now I just don't care.