How do I deal with this situation?

Me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 months now. I have high anxiety and suffer a lot of panic attacks-especially at night. My boyfriend has become a big aid with that. The other day we got into an argument and he mentioned that his friends (old coworkers that became good friends) think I’m a handful. I’ve never really met them or hung out with them so they obviously only have an opinion based on what my boyfriend tells them. He sees them multiple times a week-at least once a week. I asked him why they’d think that and that it makes me unhappy to be seen like that by strangers. He said that maybe one day we could all hang out and I could show them what I’m like. I agreed. So today, I asked to see him later but he told me he already had plans with his friends tonight at 8 and that they’re going to an arcade. I was hoping he’d invite me but he never did. It’s been 3 hours since he told me he was on his way to meet them. im just feeling really neglected. He’s our with people who don’t have a good opinion about me and I wasn’t invited once again. He never takes me out to anything that involves other people. He occasionally takes me out on dates but just us two. I feel like he’s not proud to be with me. He doesn’t post or talk about me on social media. I know not everyone does that but it just aids in the whole pride thing. I don’t know how to bring any of this up or if I even should.

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IrishPat · M

He only brought it up during an argument? So he was trying to be hurtful. Now it has left you with even more anxiety. What age are you both? Three months isn’t a long time, unless you hang out together every given minute of the day. There’s still a lot of learning about each other to do.
I think it’s unfair he would say that to you in a fight and still choose to hang out with them over you after. If the relationship was longer it would be easier to say what’s right and wrong here. Maybe a talk with him to discuss each other’s feelings would help to see where to go from here

Lupepnte

@IrishPat we are 20

QuietEd2019 · 31-35, M

@Lupepnte 20 wow that’s the kind of insensitive behaviour on his part i might expect from a younger teenager who didn’t know better but at 20 he should know how to treat him better... he sounds like a playground bully

Eidolon · M

I say...Less unwritten/inherent expectations, more written/verbalised expectations.
It seems to me like this has little to do with pride or embarrassment, and more to do with communication.
If you feel neglected, tell him where/what/why.
If you feel you want to be invited to go out with his friends to the arcade, ask him.
Just communicate more, don't expect him to know or follow-through on what you have in mind, express your thoughts/feelings more openly and transparently.
Similarly, if he is embarrassed about you in any way, he should express those sentiments with you.

SW-User

@Eidolon [quote] Just communicate more, [b]don't expect him to know or follow-through on what you have in mind,[/b] [/quote]

OP, Please listen to this advice.

SW-User

I agree with @Miram. Host them over for dinner and take it from there.

Miram · 31-35, F

I'd ask them to come over for dinner.

ScarletWitch · 26-30, F

No real boyfriend goes out without bringing their gf with unless you chose not to. If that's not the case. It's been only 3 months. Better drop the man now then put up with the same bullshit. How could he not want to take you.

MyPokerFace · 51-55, M

Have a bar b que and invite them

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