I really fell for her but now she's unsure and I don’t know how to move on
I’ve been holding this in for a while and I thought maybe it would help to share and hear from others who’ve been through something similar.
Some time ago, my sister introduced me to a girl. From the first time we spoke, I felt something strong. We connected quickly, and even though I’m a naturally quiet person, I found myself opening up to her. I liked her a lot, and I think she knew. We had conversations that felt deep and real, and I started imagining a future together.
At one point, she told me she didn’t feel right about us texting all the time due to religious reasons and I respected that because I share the same beliefs. After that, she returned to her country and we didn’t talk for around six months. But during that time, we still kind of kept up with each other through my sister. She would often ask my sister about me and tell her how much she liked me. That gave me hope.
Then recently she came back to visit, and things picked up again. We started spending time together. We talked more openly than before. That’s when I spoke to her seriously about the future. I told her about my lifestyle, how I live a simple and calm life, and asked her if she could see herself moving here if things worked out between us. She said she was okay with it. She even said she liked my way of living and could be happy here.
So I took that as a sign. I gave her my time, my care, my attention. I drove her around whenever she needed something, checked on her, and tried to be someone she could rely on. I never said “I love you” out loud, but everything I did came from a place of love and real intention.
Then slowly, things began to shift.
We started texting more often, and for a while everything seemed fine. But recently, she told me she’s not so sure anymore. That maybe I’m too quiet for her. That she wants someone more outgoing and expressive. I tried to explain that sometimes it’s hard for me because English isn’t my first language, and I naturally tend to take time to get fully comfortable with people. But with her, I was trying. I was really trying.
She also said she’s now unsure about living here, even though she said she was okay with it before. She said she’s used to a different kind of lifestyle and doesn’t want to change me or herself too much. And she mentioned that her mum isn’t fully convinced either, which added more uncertainty.
Now, with just a few days left before she travels again, I’m left in this place of confusion, still caring deeply about someone who’s unsure about me. She told me she’s not closing the door completely, but that she doesn’t know anymore. And I can’t keep living in that space of “maybe.” I want something real, something clear. I’m not angry at her. I still care about her deeply. But I don’t want to stay stuck hoping she’ll one day be sure about me.
I’m thinking of sending her one final message before she leaves. Not to convince her. Not to change her mind. Just to tell her how I truly felt and to have some closure for myself.
I fall hard when I fall. And right now, it’s hard to see a future that doesn’t have her in it. But I also know life moves on, and maybe this wasn’t meant to be.
Have any of you ever been in a situation like this? Should I send her the message or just let it go quietly? What helped you move on
Some time ago, my sister introduced me to a girl. From the first time we spoke, I felt something strong. We connected quickly, and even though I’m a naturally quiet person, I found myself opening up to her. I liked her a lot, and I think she knew. We had conversations that felt deep and real, and I started imagining a future together.
At one point, she told me she didn’t feel right about us texting all the time due to religious reasons and I respected that because I share the same beliefs. After that, she returned to her country and we didn’t talk for around six months. But during that time, we still kind of kept up with each other through my sister. She would often ask my sister about me and tell her how much she liked me. That gave me hope.
Then recently she came back to visit, and things picked up again. We started spending time together. We talked more openly than before. That’s when I spoke to her seriously about the future. I told her about my lifestyle, how I live a simple and calm life, and asked her if she could see herself moving here if things worked out between us. She said she was okay with it. She even said she liked my way of living and could be happy here.
So I took that as a sign. I gave her my time, my care, my attention. I drove her around whenever she needed something, checked on her, and tried to be someone she could rely on. I never said “I love you” out loud, but everything I did came from a place of love and real intention.
Then slowly, things began to shift.
We started texting more often, and for a while everything seemed fine. But recently, she told me she’s not so sure anymore. That maybe I’m too quiet for her. That she wants someone more outgoing and expressive. I tried to explain that sometimes it’s hard for me because English isn’t my first language, and I naturally tend to take time to get fully comfortable with people. But with her, I was trying. I was really trying.
She also said she’s now unsure about living here, even though she said she was okay with it before. She said she’s used to a different kind of lifestyle and doesn’t want to change me or herself too much. And she mentioned that her mum isn’t fully convinced either, which added more uncertainty.
Now, with just a few days left before she travels again, I’m left in this place of confusion, still caring deeply about someone who’s unsure about me. She told me she’s not closing the door completely, but that she doesn’t know anymore. And I can’t keep living in that space of “maybe.” I want something real, something clear. I’m not angry at her. I still care about her deeply. But I don’t want to stay stuck hoping she’ll one day be sure about me.
I’m thinking of sending her one final message before she leaves. Not to convince her. Not to change her mind. Just to tell her how I truly felt and to have some closure for myself.
I fall hard when I fall. And right now, it’s hard to see a future that doesn’t have her in it. But I also know life moves on, and maybe this wasn’t meant to be.
Have any of you ever been in a situation like this? Should I send her the message or just let it go quietly? What helped you move on
