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Come on in - the water of delusion is fine

Schools are calling to ban cell phones. Again, this time in Florida (mind you, be don't ban them behind the wheel, in public quiet places or anywhere else). And that's fine. A student doesn't need a phone inside a classroom. 77% of the nation already enjoys phone-free buildings or zones, according to the US Dept. of Ed.

But in Florida, this is a quandry. Because now DeSantis wants all phones out of schools. Not for education, mind you; Florida enjoys 244 schools with an F grade, and that's after revising student test scores to lift up the lower percentile. He, like many authoritarians, simply detests information.

But four U.S. states—Arizona, Maine, Maryland, and Utah -- all tried recently to enact some level of cellphone ban or at least explore cell phone restrictions, according to the National Conference of State Legislatures. And in every case, the legislation failed to make it to prime time.

Why? Because Americans don't like being told what to do, whether or not it makes sense. And we are Floriduh, The Freedum State, where you can't tell us what to do in any scenario. Except DeSantis now wants to tell you what to do, and what he wants you to do is cut communication with your child during school hours.

It's such a hard decision when the all-seeing light of authoritarianism finally looks your way.

Hush now baby don't you cry
Mama's gonna make all of your
Nightmares come true
Mama's gonna put all of her fears into you
Mama's gonna keep you right here
Under her wing
She won't let you fly but she might let you sing
Mama will keep baby cosy and warm
Of course Mama's gonna help build the wall
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