Will your crystals and magical elixirs give you super powers?

It's as I always feared, my mother joined SW.

I doubt it…I’m the dickhead that licked the Himalayan salt lamp to see if it was really salty

They give everyone the exact same superpowers… The ability to make your hard-money vanish, and your logical thinking friends to go away.

Every time I hear people proclaim they're mystics...

[youtube=https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=L3LHAlcrTRA]

i'm not into that stuff, kinda wish i was to give myself some peace of mind.

Nah. Only devouring the fresh, still beating hearts of my enemies does give me powers.

I'm not going to lie, some of those look like sex toys.

I hope I get my chosen super power once I get one.

Wouldn't that be something?!