im trying to get better but why do i always end up in the same place?

i hate the fact that every single time i try to improve and try to get better i always fall back into my stupid, exhausted, insignificant kind of mind. And believe me i really do want to get better and i want my family to be proud of me for finally getting better but i always come back? like whats wrong with me. can my stupid little brain just fucking listen for once. like one thing can mess me up for a fucking week. like sometimes the things my parents can say can make me really sad. like one time i got a 75% for a test and they asked me "did you try your hardest?" like ofc i did im trying my hardest to stay fucking alive but i cant bring that up cos my stupid little brain struggles to communicate my feelings whether they be romantic or sad. this shit is just so fucking exhausting like myself i have an obligation to be the role model for the family since i was the "good middle child" but now i cant do anything, i cant motivate myself to do anything and all i do is sit on my ass and play stupid little games on my stupid little ipad to make me feeling smth. like what do i need to do. what else can i fucking do. my parents said they would try and get me therapy but that didnt fucking happen so what do i do i tried fucking everything and it doesn't work

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aoibh0ellie · 16-17, F

I struggle with mental health too, especially at the moment. It makes it hard to stay on task and be productive. I’ve tried lots of things so I won’t say them all, but here’s the things I found most successful to help motivate me and lift my mood:

- write a to-do list. Each morning or the night before, write a few things you want to do. Make sure to include something you enjoy like watching your favourite show. This will give you something to look forward too.

- put a note out for yourself. Okay ik it sounds stupid but hear me out. Mines on my bathroom mirror for when I brush my teeth for bed. It has a few questions like “what’s one thing you enjoyed today” it helps me with gratitude and positivity which I STRUGGLE with.

I hope it helps and I hope you get through this <3

cyberdude28 · 31-35, M

"can my stupid little brain just fucking listen for once."

I think you are being very harsh on yourself, unfortunately. I'm my opinion, If you want your brain to listen, I think you should start by being more kind and appreciative of it. If you belittle your own brain it will resent and work against you sort of speak.

Please treat your brain kindly, praise it and appreciate it when it's fully deserved so that it may cooperate for you.

cyberdude28 · 31-35, M

"(People) who says (they) can and (people) who says (they) can't are both usually right"

SW-User

Bring up therapy again. Sometimes, an objective person can help with suggesting steps to take... a little at a time.
I do think less time on Ipad and maybe a bit more time taking a walk, joining a group that interests you, etc... is a good first step.

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