Do you have any trick or tip to stop People pleasing?

Like even on a phone call asking a store something or placing an order for takeout, I immediately go into a pleasing, I'll cater- to- whatever -you -say Tone. It's ingrained after decades of feeling if I didn't, people would feel I'm a awful person, like I was being called at home. But how do you stop trying to please??? It's very hard😧

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PerfectionOfTheHeart · 46-50, F

Don’t think it’s as easy as flipping a switch. It’s a very long corrective process due to the brainwashing-like effect that’s shaped your heart into thinking it has to be liked by others in order to exist. Unfortunately it takes something like reaching a breaking point and your heart getting broken one too many times for it to finally get the message that this isn’t working. Your brain is already on board by that point but it’s been silenced for too long. It’s just needing your heart to play catch up and when it does don’t be surprised if anger is the main emotion felt for a bit. There’s no room for people pleasing when anger is present, but it’s a natural reaction to uncovering the truth of how people pleasing kept you a prisoner for years, robbing you of enjoying your own happiness instead of the illusion of it generated by being in the service of others.