I Speak French

After many tortuous hours of studying French at school, the only things I seem to have retained are:
“where is the toilet ?”
“Where is the cat/dog?”
“My name is x and I live in x”
“Would you like to sleep with me tonight?”
(Though to be honest I think the last one was down to Patti La belle rather than my French teacher)
So if I ever lose a pet in France and they’re hiding in the toilet only to be found by a French hottie I want to sleep with I’ll be fine.
Otherwise I’m completely on my own.