I rescued a crow from our asshole property manager today.

Went over to the house next to where he lives to deliver a 24 hour notice of entry, and he was all smiles, telling me he'd caught a crow that fell out of his nest. Offered to sell him to me for three hundred bucks, and mentioned he had a couple of other people interested in him.

I am under no illusion that crows make good pets, and I'm fully aware that it's actually cruel to them. But here was a bird in need of help. Ignacio had him under a laundry basket in his garage with a dumbbell on top of the laundry basket, and no food or water.

So I pretended to be interested in buying the crow, and told him I had to call my mom to release the funds. She, predictably, told me repeatedly that selling or trading crows is illegal, even reciting the Migratory Bird Act of 1916. Ignacio, not wanting to do federal time, gave me the crow instead.


I'm feeding him wet cat food for right now. As soon as I'm sure he's strong enough, I'm turning him loose.