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How to warm up a relationship that has went cold for some time now?

By cold I mean dead cold - not talking.
Katie01 · F
Introduce a third person
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@Katie01 I'm not interested in anyone else
Katie01 · F
@Dan193 your partner might be
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@Katie01 fuck that, she's only mine
TexChik · F
I guess tying her up and throwing her (I am assuming its a her) on a fire isnt the answer...🤭. If it has died, really all you can do is a post mortem and determine where is all went wrong and strive not to make those mistakes again. It happens
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@TexChik so what's your advice? I don't think I got the analogy.
Londonn · 36-40, M
walk and never look back. there is a reason for it happened, learn to accept the facts
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@Londonn you're not helping
Londonn · 36-40, M
@Dan193 you worry too much brota
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@Londonn how should I go about it?
iamnikki · 31-35, F
I'd let it freeze on over to be honest
Done trying to rekindle relationships
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@iamnikki but I see her every week, at work. Like as soon as I feel like I'm over it, I see her and it fucks my brain up and I want her again.
iamnikki · 31-35, F
@Dan193 tell her how you feel, if she bites, great. If not, move on
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@iamnikki she is not like the other girls, straight up doesn't work with her.
Miklee02 · 51-55, F
Do something new with them
Miklee02 · 51-55, F
@Dan193 why not?
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@Miklee02 because we don't talk at all r8ght now.
Miklee02 · 51-55, F
@Dan193 oh ugh sooooo try talking again?
Start by talking again. Ask to spend time together. Watch a movie maybe have dinner or a board games night,whatever you are into.
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@PepsiColaP how do I start talking again?
@Dan193 just how youd talk to anyone I suppose. Let them know you miss them and want to spend time with them. I dont know where you left it off so im not sure what the most appropriate way to approach this would be
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@PepsiColaP I see. Thanks
If it went cold because of them, I doubt it'll ever get as warm as you wish
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@BeefySenpie really? What's the common solution?
@Dan193 If you think the relationship is worthwhile, try to be patient but don't wait forever. Communicate openly
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@BeefySenpie how to communicate openly in this situation? What do I say?
Start talking. If it's awkward move on. If it just like picking up where you left off that's a good friendship
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@Callmewhatyouwill how do I start talking again?
@Dan193 that's kind of subjective to what that person responds to. What ever it happens to be it should be organic, also a reason for contacting. I tend to go with relevant situations with that person.

Your mileage may vary.
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@Callmewhatyouwill I see. Thanks
Eddiesolds · 61-69, M
Why do you stay together? Have you got kids?
@Dan193 Weak would be you both losing a love that needs rekindling. A timid person needs to become bolder. It can happen. Time and patience and conversation about it helps. Perhaps she feels you may reject her? Discover the reason.
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@PoetryNEmotion how could I open up the subject? How could I even begin talking to her again?
@Dan193 Something caused this distance. You must have an idea. Ask her to meet with you and to discuss this at great length. You said she still wants you. Either she really does or does not. Be respectful. If she is timid, encourage her to talk. If you cannot resolve this, move on forward alone.
KiwiBird · 36-40, F
Dinner with Caroline Reaper Chilli...

Cast Iron Guarantee....it will heat things up.
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@KiwiBird any real advice?
passingby8 · 31-35, F
Watch a dating life coach on youtube lol or dating videos.
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@passingby8 makes more sense, than this. You're right
ginnyfromtheblock · 26-30, F
wait not talking to what extent, like no contact?
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@ginnyfromtheblock Like hello and goodbye. That's all.
SW-User
Travel together
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@SW-User covid?
SW-User
@Dan193 Wait until you both are vaccinated
Talk honestly.
@Dan193 i know exactly what I'm saying .
I'm saying i have no other advice for you than that .

You either find a way to communicate what you are thinking and feeling, or you don't.

If you can't....i can't see that anything will change,

We can't expect a person to know what we're thinking at the best of times.
I get that you have problems with talking , but there are other ways around that.
There's texting, there are apps to help people communicate.


You're the one assuming I know nothing about this.
I've studied communication methods down to the nonverbal.
I've studied and practiced teaching people with autism the "desire and impulse " to want to communicate verbally.

I understand that to some degree the difficulty many have in facing up to communicating, right down to the neural level.

Believe me ....if you can form sentences....there is a way to do this.

Communication isn't only verbal.

Find out wjat makes it difficult for you, and work around it 🤷‍♀️

If social anxiety is an issue....texting is a good place to start.
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@OogieBoogie
[quote]You either find a way to communicate what you are thinking and feeling, or you don't.[/quote]
This is the whole purpose of my question, to find out specifically how I do that, so don't judge me and tell me I'm doing nothing.
For somebody that says they know so much about communication, you are not doing a very good job at it right now.
@Dan193 i never said you were Doing nothing.
I gave possibilities.

And I've given you a specific example of an option in my second reply .


I'm not judging you, I offered experienced available realites tjat you must face.


You are being now accusative and rude.
I tried to be helpful and show you that I understand the difficulties.
And all you habw done is judge me and be rude .


You don't seen to have any problem communicating at all.

Insults and all.


So here's one for you ....hypocrite. 😡
MartinTheFirst · 22-25, M
You talk about each others interests
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@MartinTheFirst give me an exapmle of what to say
MartinTheFirst · 22-25, M
@Dan193 just be honest and open, there's no phrase that will work it's all about your attitude.
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Londonn · 36-40, M
@Stereoguy finally someone said it! :D
Dan193 · 26-30, M
@Stereoguy Funny. But anything more serious..?

 
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