Can best friends be against your choices?

When my mom was alive, my family and even my best friend were against me living with my mother. She abandoned us to have her own life but she chose drug over us. After she got cleaned up, she left us. I refuses to believe that she abandoned us. My brothers want nothing to do with mom and told me it was a stupid idea to want to live with my mom and she would just leave again. I wanted to live with her when I was 16. Even my best friend was like, "Why do you wanna stay with a drug addict woman that made it clear she doesn't want you? She is just going to hurt you again so why bother considering it?" In a blunt, direct tone. I thought she would be in my side. Disappointing. I wouldn't say anything. I was hurt by her answer. My mom died five months ago over drug overdose and not a lot of people are sad or have sympathy towards her. Not even my bestie.

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AmbivalentFriability · 26-30

I think your best friend just wanted to look out for your best interests.

Being a good friend means being honest even when the truth hurts.

ElizabethBabe1994 · 26-30, F

@AmbivalentFriability Well it really stung me she said that. I mean I wanted my mother so bad but she kept reminding me that the woman only cared about herself and quit chasing after that selfish bitch and stand on my two goddamn feet and move on.
I really wanted my mommy. My dad even said my best friend is right and I need to quit chasing after that druggy mother and I didn't need her.

AmbivalentFriability · 26-30

@ElizabethBabe1994
They weren't wrong. They could have worded it more gently, but to go after someone who was supposed to love you, and didn't consider her children a priority, would be directly seeking pain and disappointment.
It should have been your mother's job to get sober and to seek you out and make it work, not yours.

ElizabethBabe1994 · 26-30, F

@AmbivalentFriability Yes but I never had a loving mother.

AmbivalentFriability · 26-30

@ElizabethBabe1994 That's a statement. It isn't a reason that your friend and father should lie to you to just to make you feel better.

My mother has been mentally ill all my life, my dad was an alcoholic. They've hardly been present in my life as parental figures.
It sucks, and I wish I'd had parents who guided me and supported me. But I didn't. I don't. And nothing will ever change that. They won't change because I want them to. It just doesn't work that way.

ElizabethBabe1994 · 26-30, F

@AmbivalentFriability Sorry about your parents. I guess I had to accept the hard brutal fact thay my mom would never wanted me and I'll never have a mother/daughter relationship. I don't want no one to lie to me. My dad said, "I rather tell someone the painful truth and make them cry than to lie to make someone feel better. Sometimes you gotta be cruel to be kind." Harsh but true. Plus not a lot of people have sympathy over my mom's death. I'm still heartbroken about my mommy's death.