No alcohol no friends
I went to a wedding last night of two old friends that I love dearly but never see. I wanted to stay all night, but I also saw some older friends that I haven’t seen in months because I didn’t want to see them. And because alcohol is a thing at weddings, people were drunk. Two of these friends were acting CRAZY. Accusing me of sleeping with baby daddies, trying to fight me, angry and yelling at me because I don’t answer their texts.
I’ve tried explaining my son and I are in therapy. We’re not too busy, but I don’t want him around people that suck. And these people suck. They complain about everything, talk about people behind their backs and the types that claim their good people while they destroy your heart. I have tried over and over to be honest about how I feel and the boundaries I need, but I ended up having one person following me to my van to yell at me how sorry he is for manipulating me but it seemed to me he was still trying to!
They still wanted me to enable their temper tantrums and validate their unwillingness to solve their own problems. Which first off I can’t do anyway. Second, I’ve told them my son and I come first. These people have families, and my son and I have no one. And every time I reached out for help they made it worse. They made it about them.
As much as I wish I could help everyone and be there for people like I could before I was a mom, I can’t give that much. I don’t understand how people take and take and take and scream for more. People have dumped on me over and over and I don’t want anyone else’s shit anymore. I don’t want their drama or their unhealed anger. I wish I could help people, but I’m quite alone and running low on hope myself.
Perhaps I’m wrong to wish the people I’m around would take care of themselves and that my honesty were respected. To me being an honest friend is the best I can be. I remember being that person that cried on people all the time expecting them to make it better, but I learned only I can make it better. No one can help. I know these people see me as strong, but I don’t want to be someone’s rock when they build everything out of sand. Maybe I’m just a jerk. But my son needs me and we need good friends. I don’t believe people that drain you are good friends. And sorry but alcohol is disgusting.
I’ve tried explaining my son and I are in therapy. We’re not too busy, but I don’t want him around people that suck. And these people suck. They complain about everything, talk about people behind their backs and the types that claim their good people while they destroy your heart. I have tried over and over to be honest about how I feel and the boundaries I need, but I ended up having one person following me to my van to yell at me how sorry he is for manipulating me but it seemed to me he was still trying to!
They still wanted me to enable their temper tantrums and validate their unwillingness to solve their own problems. Which first off I can’t do anyway. Second, I’ve told them my son and I come first. These people have families, and my son and I have no one. And every time I reached out for help they made it worse. They made it about them.
As much as I wish I could help everyone and be there for people like I could before I was a mom, I can’t give that much. I don’t understand how people take and take and take and scream for more. People have dumped on me over and over and I don’t want anyone else’s shit anymore. I don’t want their drama or their unhealed anger. I wish I could help people, but I’m quite alone and running low on hope myself.
Perhaps I’m wrong to wish the people I’m around would take care of themselves and that my honesty were respected. To me being an honest friend is the best I can be. I remember being that person that cried on people all the time expecting them to make it better, but I learned only I can make it better. No one can help. I know these people see me as strong, but I don’t want to be someone’s rock when they build everything out of sand. Maybe I’m just a jerk. But my son needs me and we need good friends. I don’t believe people that drain you are good friends. And sorry but alcohol is disgusting.
