Have you ever experienced this? What was it?
Discovering something in yourself is an amazing thing. It’s too bad you can’t share it with others because they haven’t discovered it in themself and yourself is only place you’ll find it.
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OogieBoogie · F
Ooh , i know this feeling.
So ...long story of a moment :
I have a son with severe autism . His life is so limited , school and public spaces and language is very difficult for him . Socialising is a definite no no.
Anywho, one day im sitting in the car after i dropped him off at school, knowing it would be yet another hard day for him. We had gone through his habit of like 10 goodbyes and 6 i love you's, which sounds really sweet , but it happend every time. And it gets hard some days to say those things with heartfelt intent so many times .
( but you try to ).
Anyway , i was sitting in the car watching him walk away ....and i got this sudden , OVERWHELMING, sense of love and appreciation for him being MY son . That he was given to me .
That for all the struggles and hardships his autism had made him, and our family go through ....this incredibly sweet boy was MY son .
Suddenly i got to fully appreciate in a huge wave of understanding, his compassion , his huge kind heart, his strength and patience and massive tolerance of an uncaring noisy world.
And how he was never going to be a bully, or cruel to someone, or go out and do stupid things .
He was a lovely loving young man , and i got to be his mother .
And out of all the parents he could have got , fate chose me .
It hit me like an intense wave. Its so hard to explain . But it was such a cherished moment . It literally punched air from my lungs it hit so hard.
After years of secret tears of frustration and sooooo much effort on both our parts......i finally got it. I finally appreciated all that he is .
It still makes me cry thinking of it ....good tears. 🤗
But its a moment tjat will never fade in my memory. Its like the universe suddenly opened up and poured understanding on me and i got to see.
It wrecked me for over half an hour . I couldn't drive, i kept bursting into happy tears and i felt my heart filling up with what i had not understood or appreciated for too long . It was amazing .
So ...long story of a moment :
I have a son with severe autism . His life is so limited , school and public spaces and language is very difficult for him . Socialising is a definite no no.
Anywho, one day im sitting in the car after i dropped him off at school, knowing it would be yet another hard day for him. We had gone through his habit of like 10 goodbyes and 6 i love you's, which sounds really sweet , but it happend every time. And it gets hard some days to say those things with heartfelt intent so many times .
( but you try to ).
Anyway , i was sitting in the car watching him walk away ....and i got this sudden , OVERWHELMING, sense of love and appreciation for him being MY son . That he was given to me .
That for all the struggles and hardships his autism had made him, and our family go through ....this incredibly sweet boy was MY son .
Suddenly i got to fully appreciate in a huge wave of understanding, his compassion , his huge kind heart, his strength and patience and massive tolerance of an uncaring noisy world.
And how he was never going to be a bully, or cruel to someone, or go out and do stupid things .
He was a lovely loving young man , and i got to be his mother .
And out of all the parents he could have got , fate chose me .
It hit me like an intense wave. Its so hard to explain . But it was such a cherished moment . It literally punched air from my lungs it hit so hard.
After years of secret tears of frustration and sooooo much effort on both our parts......i finally got it. I finally appreciated all that he is .
It still makes me cry thinking of it ....good tears. 🤗
But its a moment tjat will never fade in my memory. Its like the universe suddenly opened up and poured understanding on me and i got to see.
It wrecked me for over half an hour . I couldn't drive, i kept bursting into happy tears and i felt my heart filling up with what i had not understood or appreciated for too long . It was amazing .
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Casheyane · 31-35, F
Casheyane · 31-35, F
@Reject It is quite the story when that happens. But then at times maturity tends to come when we start bearing responsibility and caring more for others than we do ourselves. It takes something though... things... to see that or to even realize it's a possibility.
Most people tend to remain in their comfort.
Most people tend to remain in their comfort.
WhateverWorks · 36-40
Yes and no. I think… it’s tricky because that line of thinking can be a slippery slope to a superiority complex and condescension
Reject · 26-30, M
@WhateverWorks So is an assumption just something a truly humble person can never have?
WhateverWorks · 36-40
An assumption about others is just another word for judgment of other people, especially when the observer places themselves as better than the other, so.. that would be in direct contradiction of humility. I think the task of the humble person or rather, someone who seeks humility as a virtue, is to consistently check in with oneself to make sure that they are not engaging in judgmental thought process @Reject
Reject · 26-30, M
@WhateverWorks I think every single human being judges. Even humble ones. The difference is simple. Proud people are content with how they judge. They think it’s right and absolute. They can’t be mistaken. Humble ones are simply trying to understand a part of something with an open mind to what else it could be. They know they don’t understand everything. That’s just how I see it though. I can’t think of someone who never judges. I’m not sure that’s possible.
SinlessOnslaught · 26-30, M
But then it is ok coz not all prefer tea.
Perhaps you stated too bad in the sense that there had not been a single soul to share with. That too is ok as we all are on our solo journeys.
My discovery is for me alone, a help, an aid of a sort.
Perhaps you stated too bad in the sense that there had not been a single soul to share with. That too is ok as we all are on our solo journeys.
My discovery is for me alone, a help, an aid of a sort.
Reject · 26-30, M
@V00doo I see! It’s just a theory of mine, but I think part of discovering your new self is letting your old self go. I’ve only seen that happen you find something bigger than you to change for. That’s how you overcome to fulfill it. If it was smaller, you’d just stay the same. No change needed.
