Well i've finished the whole ding dang Bible, cover to cover! Can't say i've become Christian but im basically a Bible scholar now lol. Any questions?

Now return it to the library and make sure to put it into the "Fantasy" section

And finally move to something more pleasurable like the Lord of the Rings

I've read it a few times and it's still a load of horse shit.

Really glad you have read the Bible through but become a ‘scholar’? I think you’ll find that this piece of literature has been the subject of more books than any other so I think you’ve got quite a bit to go! 😊

As a guide to how to lead a moral life, it's ok if you leave out all the supernatural nonsense of the magical sky fairy. It's obviously also written by Men who were seeking to control others and keep them in line so a lot of it is pure fiction and fantasy. Tell anyone a story and if we were able to move into the future 500 years it would be comical to see what that story has become being retold time after time...

You read the New Living Translation version? lol. That's a false Bible. The only true Bible and preserved Word of God in the English language is the King James Bible. The modern Bible versions have removed scriptures, added scriptures, twisted scriptures and are filled with many contradictions and absurdities. Modern Bible versions have been corrupted. Start over. Read the real Bible - get yourself an Authorized King James Bible and in the meantime, educate yourself on the Bible version issue and watch this documentary:

[youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iXK8yJj-S4U&t=12s]

Two questions...

1. Which translation?

2. Will you be moving on to the Apocrypha to read just what the Church didn't want you to read about Christianity and left out of the approved Bible?

3. If the Jewish god said you will have no other gods "before me", does that mean he/she/it was admitting to the existence of other gods and just demanding the Jewish people worship him/her/it as more important than those other gods?

That is a generous score. Lol

Which one? There are several versions. Some don't even include the same books.

I read it once but all the contradictions made it very difficult to follow.

Milk exploding.
THAT IS FUCKIN METAL!! WOOOOOOO! 🤘

I would like to re-read the pentateuch. Well not numbers lol. I liked Moses and the Bible is more fun when god is actively speaking and interacting. Those Israelites though. Het a grip, my dudes! lol.
Obviously the story of Samson is hilarious and must read it again.

Better have read all the Pseudepigrapha in the Orthodox and Ethiopian canons, or you were playing on easy mode.

Are you Ned Flanders cos I sure as hell heard his voice when I read “ding dang bible” 🤔

haha, you’re my favorite now