Can you still remember what it was like a couple of months ago?Where the only time you started panic buying was when the bartender said "Last call!"
I absolutely hate that my chances of survival during this period are inextricably linked to other people having commonsense.
Have your ever forgotten what it was you were going to cook for a meal?Earlier we had discussed what we could have for dinner. I went in to make it (Boiled baby potatoes and salad) But forgot and made toasted cheese sandwiches instead.
I'd like to give a huge shout out to all the Hospital staff who have been going to work during this time of crisis.We can't thank you enough for doing what you do.
I love the feeling when you finally get in bed and turn off the lights and think; "I've been wanting to do this since 7:00 this morning."
Do you think the world is getting too sensitive?Pretty soon you wont be able to make fun of yourself without people getting offended!
I wonder why we are so so obsessed with trying to find intelligent life on other planets, when we can't even find intelligent life here?
Hey sexy, Shut the door, drop your pants, climb on top of me and satisfy your needs.Love always your toilet. 🚽
You know, with all this hoarding its the Shoplifter's I feel sorry for.There's nothing left for them to steal.
So the Prime Minister of Australia said we should avoid crowds of 100 people -But going to the shops and school is acceptable... I'm guessing he has never helped his wife with the grocery shopping.
Who else thought hoarding toilet paper was a ridiculous thing to do a week ago and now only has a dirty bum to prove it?
My dad had the sniffles this morning. So Work told him he can have the week off..To think, the one night he doesn't wear socks to bed and he gets the sniffles...
Why do tennis player grunt when they hit the ball?They act like it takes a great effort. You ever hit a tennis ball as hard as you can?
Daddy reads some bedtime stories to make little Jonny fall asleep.Half an hour later mommy opens quietly the door and asks: “And, is he asleep?” - Little Jonny answers: “Yes, finally.”
An old guy in his Volvo is driving home from work when his wife rings him on his cell phone."Honey," she says in a worried voice, "please be careful. There was a bit on the news just now, some lunatic is driving the wrong way down the highway." - "Oh it's worse than that," he replies, "there are hundreds of them!"