And then Jesus said unto them: “with the strength of 10 crackheads I promise I’ll destroy you.”The end
I’m gonna start saying “oh so it’s like Kohl’s cash” next time a man tries to explain crypto to me when I didn’t ask
When I was diagnosed with bipolar I was really nervous to tell all my friends because I thought they’d think of me differentBut instead they replied with “yeah,” and it was actually pretty insulting
Trying to explain ocd to other people is such a humbling experienceLike no, I can’t explain why I’m scared to touch the kitchen faucet but I’m okay with every other one, I just am.
Being “overdressed” is a myth made up by boring people who don’t want you to have fun and be sexyDon’t fall for their trickery
You ever meet someone whose personality reminds you of how the Eucharist tastes at a Catholic Church?
I hate when musicians change the pronouns when doing a cover of a love songLike bro, you can’t be bi for 3 minutes and 47 seconds?
You ever meet someone who has a stick so far up their ass you just want to offer them laxatives to see if it’ll helpLife isn’t that serious, please relax before your heart gives out on you.
People who grew up with money will deadass look you in the eyes and ask you some insane shit like “do you ski?”