Aww. 🤗. Cheer up . I’m sure yiu will find your way ,eventually

What I did when all i saw was darkness everywhere is start very small with positive things. Being depressed was more comfortable to me than being happy. I had to work hard to find the positives. Maybe it was the sun in the sky one day. We would be totally screwed if it didn't rise and set. The next day maybe a cute commercial. It hard but if you look for happiness you will find it. Medication can help sometimes too.

Its not a good feeling that's for sure , and people cant understand what you go through, it happens if people have anxiety or depression , maybe see if you can get help don't let it destroy your life.