I Wish I Was In a Great Relationship
Firstly, I'm so glad to find out that EP is back in a brand new platform! Brings back lots of my memories.
Well, I found this cute young guy on an online dating app at the end of June '19 (I'm a guy too, anyway). We exchanged numbers and started to text each other but it wasn't that intense until almost a month later when we reached each other again and began to text quite intensively.
We met up at a coffee shop at the end of July. There was a silly moment when h tried to find my and when he did he did not call me but instead he took a picture of me from behind and sent it over the chat. I looked back and saw this lean tall boy with a cute smile risen from his face. He was very sweet, and we spent hours to talk that night. There was that particular feelings came up that I never had before. To be honest I never been in a serious relationship and never been this close to other before. Long story short, after that meetup, we started to text even more intensively, texting "Good Morning", taking each other's pictures, and even another meetups came up after that.
We had our first kiss during our second "date". I took him for dinner, followed by an endless motorbike riding while holding his hand and ended up seating in a park where we kissed for the first time (and sadly the last as well). Eversince that day I convinced myself that he is the one, being so thrilled that after all this time, being so hard to accept and take people to come into my life, I finally get myself in a relationship.
Everything went well eversince. Until on Saturday, 17th August, it was the last time we texted each other. He DMed me on instagram saying that he's on low battery but still had a small talk about his plan for that day.....until he vanished..for good....
I tried to text him on the following day as we supposed to go out on that day but no response. But I could accept it as I saw him posting a picture of a night out with his friends and I thought that he might still be wasted at that time. But I ended up with no response the whole day. I expected to received his good morning message on the following day. But I didn't hear any...
Texted and DMed him again that Monday to check if he's fine. He did not read my message and even did not pick up my phone calls...! Still no response...
Until on Tuesday when I was on a lunch break at work, I found out that he left my message on read! I also noticed that he saw the stories that I posted on Instagram, and even had a few minutes to like some posts of others! Tried to ring his phone again multiple times but no response....It was like a lightning strikes in the middle of a sunny day!
I keep questioning myself what is going on? why did this happen? What did I do wrong to deserve this? Is he freaking mad at me over something? But we did not have any issues that caused him acting this way!
I feel like I'm having a multiple personalities, the one that wants me to let go and carry on... and one that keeps me reaching him out....
I know this is a good experience for me as I never been in a (serious) relationship before. At the moment I just can't wait to pass this phase. Its just so tiring to keep questioning myself about all of this things.
At the end...life goes on. It's going to be a rough time. But I believe that I will mend this wounds at the end. Getting used to be alone again. I don't know if I will ever be able to get back in relationship again in the future...
Dit, thanks for the short but meaningful time that we spent. Sorry for all mistakes that I did that caused you acting this way. Love you....take care.
Anybody has experienced the same????
Well, I found this cute young guy on an online dating app at the end of June '19 (I'm a guy too, anyway). We exchanged numbers and started to text each other but it wasn't that intense until almost a month later when we reached each other again and began to text quite intensively.
We met up at a coffee shop at the end of July. There was a silly moment when h tried to find my and when he did he did not call me but instead he took a picture of me from behind and sent it over the chat. I looked back and saw this lean tall boy with a cute smile risen from his face. He was very sweet, and we spent hours to talk that night. There was that particular feelings came up that I never had before. To be honest I never been in a serious relationship and never been this close to other before. Long story short, after that meetup, we started to text even more intensively, texting "Good Morning", taking each other's pictures, and even another meetups came up after that.
We had our first kiss during our second "date". I took him for dinner, followed by an endless motorbike riding while holding his hand and ended up seating in a park where we kissed for the first time (and sadly the last as well). Eversince that day I convinced myself that he is the one, being so thrilled that after all this time, being so hard to accept and take people to come into my life, I finally get myself in a relationship.
Everything went well eversince. Until on Saturday, 17th August, it was the last time we texted each other. He DMed me on instagram saying that he's on low battery but still had a small talk about his plan for that day.....until he vanished..for good....
I tried to text him on the following day as we supposed to go out on that day but no response. But I could accept it as I saw him posting a picture of a night out with his friends and I thought that he might still be wasted at that time. But I ended up with no response the whole day. I expected to received his good morning message on the following day. But I didn't hear any...
Texted and DMed him again that Monday to check if he's fine. He did not read my message and even did not pick up my phone calls...! Still no response...
Until on Tuesday when I was on a lunch break at work, I found out that he left my message on read! I also noticed that he saw the stories that I posted on Instagram, and even had a few minutes to like some posts of others! Tried to ring his phone again multiple times but no response....It was like a lightning strikes in the middle of a sunny day!
I keep questioning myself what is going on? why did this happen? What did I do wrong to deserve this? Is he freaking mad at me over something? But we did not have any issues that caused him acting this way!
I feel like I'm having a multiple personalities, the one that wants me to let go and carry on... and one that keeps me reaching him out....
I know this is a good experience for me as I never been in a (serious) relationship before. At the moment I just can't wait to pass this phase. Its just so tiring to keep questioning myself about all of this things.
At the end...life goes on. It's going to be a rough time. But I believe that I will mend this wounds at the end. Getting used to be alone again. I don't know if I will ever be able to get back in relationship again in the future...
Dit, thanks for the short but meaningful time that we spent. Sorry for all mistakes that I did that caused you acting this way. Love you....take care.
Anybody has experienced the same????
26-30, M
