I Have Anxiety

I get anxiety when I hear from my mom. When i visit my mom and her side of the family. They are the dysfunctional side...
The side that brought me pain growing up.
She still wants my half brothers to have contact with my abuser, which is their father. Because he only abused me and not them. He likes girls not boys.
It's still sick.
I cannot even see her. I find it hard to forgive her because she continues to make poor decisions.
All i want is for my brothers to be safe. To have the right influences.


I'm coming to grips that I may not want my so called to see my children. I don't need my children to see their dysfunction.