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I Have a Confession

As long as I can remember , I have taken pride in being able to control my emotions.
Every time I had to face a dark or blue emotion , I sat it on the side of my mind and built a wall in front of it .
Colored the wall with happy colors and drew picture of all that I was thankful for ,
all that I loved ,
all who needed me ...
and then I moved on .
These days, looking as happy and collected as I can ,
I find myself stuck ,
inside my own mind .
Not much room to wiggle ...
I’m scared ...
Yeh, I used to do that. It gets piled up and then years later you have a load full you thought was swept under the rug and would stay there. Now you have to face it. It won’t go away until you deal with it.
SW-User
Time´s the cure.
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@SW-User
That’s what I’m going for .
@SW-User Time is NOT the cure. Facing each thing head-on, is. Otherwise, it won’t go away. The lessons are there for a reason...to learn and grow.
SW-User
I do see your point.however ,I do need to wait and calm my emotions first.
When my emotions are running high it’s hard to make the right decision sometimes 😊
TexChik · F
Time to have that cry you’ve been putting off
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@TexChik
That’s another thing I have to work on...
I don’t cry ...
Have not been able to cry in a long time ..
Im just a hot mess 😁😁😁😅😊
Unsettled situations can catch up, it might be wise to fix the easiest first.
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@SomeLikeItHot
Thank you dear!
I’ll let you know as soon as I get the inventory in order 🤗
@SW-User
I hope it is a tool and doesn’t stress your sweet heart. 🤗
SW-User
Never hurts to try .
Thanks again :-)
Texaspilot · 51-55, M
Omg. This.... it spoke to me.. thanks for sharing.
Texaspilot · 51-55, M
@SW-User my pleasure... post more stuff please! 😉
Texaspilot · 51-55, M
@TexChik Hey. Long time! How are you? Hope all is well!!
TexChik · F
@Texaspilot doing great ! 🤠
SW-User
I don't know how the song got on my workout playlist but for some reason it inspires me to break the spell that you're talking about.

It's Florence + The Machine's "Dogs Days Are Over."

I have no clue what the actual of the song is but the constant "dog days are over" and the fact I'm working out do some sort of cleanse.

Only you can break yourself out of that room. You can shine. You can (and will) take control. I know you can ;-)
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@SW-User
I have the song on my music list now !👍
I know it’s all up to me to break out of it !
I’ll try ...
🤗🤗
wintersecret · 41-45, M
spill the beans out friend.. i m sure u will feel good from inside.
SW-User
@wintersecret
Oh!
That would not be pretty 😊
wintersecret · 41-45, M
@SW-User ooh ok.
SW-User
I completely understand..the trouble is I think-that all these years when we thought we were doing well building walls, the emotion was still there...building up until the wall broke down. I don’t know what the answer is-the only thing that keeps me going is that allowing control is normal. Everyone else does it why can’t we? Hope things get easier for you xx
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@SW-User
I’m praying that those walls won’t break!
Other waist you will probably hear about a brown curly hair crazy woman running on the street on the news !😁
Yes,
I know a lot of people do it .
I hope things get easier on all of us as we go ..
Hugs
yeronlyman · 51-55, M
Get out where the skies are big above and look outwards... I find this helpful to disassociate from a tough time or inward moment and gives more wriggle room. Sincerely hope you’re okay
💐
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@yeronlyman
Thank you
I try to do that but sometimes I just slide down the downward spiral and it takes me time to crawl up again.
I’m doing much better .
Thanks again
Hugs
mathsman · 70-79, M
But also consider the origin of that emotion.
And so re-consider yourself.
I imagine you've not yet met someone you can fully open up to.
ineedadrink · 51-55, M
One step at a time. All we can do. (Just hope that its in the right direction 😉)
SW-User
Zeusdelight · 61-69, M
Such a brilliant mind. There is plenty of room still to explore!
masterofyou · 70-79, M
I hope you find your demons and destroy them..
Mysteriousliaisons · 56-60, M
Hang in there 🍷 🤗
SW-User
Mysteriousliaisons · 56-60, M
How are you today? 😊@SW-User
NudasPriest · 46-50, M
Physical pain is designed to serve as an early warning of damage - we move further away from the fire. I believe emotional pain was designed to work in a similar way - but unfortunately the required action is not always so easy to take, or even necessarily within our control.

I hope the root causes of these emotions can find some healing, alongside your ability to once again manage those that remain.
SW-User
@NudasPriest
Thank you.🤗
I realize that dismissing emotion ba won’t make them go away .
I am going to use all the advice I got here and help my self heal .
I’m a bit nervepus about facing the root causes but I’ll take things one stop at the time...
SW-User
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@SW-User
I’ll be fine dear😘🤗🤗🤗
Writing helps ..
SW-User
@SW-User 🤗🤗
This message was deleted by its author.
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@Magenta
I guess I felt like I didn’t have time to deal with them...
I was too afraid of falling apart ...
Thank you,
Sounds like a good idea..
I’ll try it .
I understand how expressing emotions can have it’s downside .
However , I have noticed you always express them so beautifully and at the end of the day , you don’t have any walls in your mind .🙂
Writing in private was very good therapy for me. You can write, cry, and get it all out at the same time, for whichever problem you need to resolve first. Then go to the next. Sure you’ll feel bad at digging up an old hurt, but after you do that, your heart will feel a lot cleaner and relieved. It is your own kind of closure. I’ve even written very emotional letters to those who have hurt me real bad, then didn’t send them, but took them out to the trash barrel, burned them, and watched them rise to God. God makes beauty out of the ashes of our life. Give it up to God. @SW-User

 
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