I can feel my death closing in. Getting ready to give up and go.

The only problem I have is, that I would not want my mom to suffer. Losing a child is one of the hardest things in life. My good friend's son committed suicide ten years ago and I know,how much he has suffered. I'm struggling. Can't keep my head straight. This silly cancer is ripping me apart, just as much mentally as physically, perhaps even more so.