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Was this rule fair? [I Was Bullied At School]

I attended a good private school located in the Los Angeles area up in the Hollywood hills. I won't name it because I am grateful to them for the excellent academic education I got there.

But I suffered greatly from the focused attention of the school bully. For a while, I was able to run away from her because I'd figured out she was afraid of bees. So I would run into the lemon orchard and grab a bee off of a lemon blossom (very gently and carefully) and as the bully ran toward me, I would throw a bee at her and she'd run away at top speed with the bee chasing her. I never got stung and began to think of the bees as my only allies in my flight from the bully.

But the school wouldn't put up with this. A meeting was held that included my mother and the next day a new rule was instituted at the school; no one was allowed to run from a fight. You had to fight your challenger or talk him/her out of it. But you were not allowed to run.
Since I'd been seriously battered by the bully, I broke the rule once and ran anyway. And got caught. And punished for running.

Here was how the teacher decided to punish me: I had to stand up in front of the whole class while every kid in the class, starting with the bully, was told to tell me something he or she didn't like about me. (I should mention that two of the kinder and braver students refused to participate in this). Since the bully started it off, and had many insults aimed at me, the rest of the class followed her lead and it was a social blood bath for me. I was beyond devastated, and I still suffer a great deal of social anxiety partly because of it. It was a cruel punishment, and that teacher should've known better.

But the rule remained and the punishment did teach me that I had to follow it. My own view is that if a school requires its students to fight under certain circumstances, the school should include fighting in its curriculum or at least offer voluntary fighting lessons after school. I endured two more years of almost daily beatings before I graduated. The bully would punch me until I tired out, then either push me down or trip me so I'd fall down, then jump on top of me, grab my neck, and bang my head on the concrete patio. I am sure I suffered many concussions from those head bangings. Today, in my old age, my doctor says some of the brain problems I have today (involving memory and organization of thoughts) probably came from those beatings.

If a school requires their students to fight when challenged, that school should give fighting instructions so that everyone knows how to fight.
Rhodesianman · 56-60, M
That is horrendous but kinda know how you feel .High school for me was a bad experience because not only were the teachers and head teacher sadist bastards but they turned a blind eye to the bullying as well .The best day of high school for me was the day I left school forever .
greenmountaingal · 70-79, F
@Rhodesianman I empathize and know the feeling. However, my story is about my elementary school years. In general however, schools tend to side with bullies (whose parents are quick to sue).
SW-User
Have you ever noticed on many TV shows and movies where bullying occurs, there's a consistent theme, in that if the victim retaliates at all they are shunned and shamed by everyone just for standing up to it. To me this represents the attitude of bullying that i dealt with at school too. The bullies were encouraged or at least ignored by teachers and parents and if you stood up to them you'd be considered someone who was a trouble maker who started the problem.

I used to fight back and had to suffer beating from the bully, the teachers then my parents when i got home. It seems like little has changed.
@SW-User In society in general its still that way. In the third world, always

And if it comes from illegitimate authority you can never be right.
Adaydreambeliever · 56-60, F
It's unfair and any school doing that now could be in big trouble.. The problem is that in bullying it's almost always unfair with one person much stronger than the other.. so the weaker, less physical one will almost always lose..

i liked your solution.. shows you were much smarter than her..

Clearly these things cause scars
Frank52 · 70-79, M
Disgusting values in that school. You did fight back in your chosen way. If that's still going on, I hope someone stands up to the school authorities and shows it for the warped institution it is (was).
@Frank52 All through school I never saw physical violence ever..from the teachers aganst the kids and I never saw any real fighting between kids and I was bullied some so I know the snarkiness that always exists in most public/private schools..but no violence.

There was a strong public school system in those days and parents were seriously involved. Other people my age have told me dozens of violence stories regarding their schools, canings, rappings, and yet my school was average, mixed ethnicities, ordinary small city and no violence. No cops no repression, just regular boring school.

Not bragging.... it sucked. But not because of overt violence
justbob · 61-69, M
I'll assume that you made this up.
justbob · 61-69, M
@Elevatorpitches Puhleeze tell me that you are not s gullible as to think this could happen without parents filing charges for abuse
@justbob how effng DARE you talk to me this way.
greenmountaingal · 70-79, F
@justbob My mother was very abusive and often went along with others who hurt me. She was pretty much on the bully's side.

If you really want to find something to disbelieve, read my Featured story here under my Profile. My mother would've considered suing a school where the bully [i] didn't[/i] beat up on me!
assemblingaknob · 26-30, F
Was your mother a big gun of the school authorities? Was it a communist school?

 
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