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I'm thinking of becoming a recluse with only online and phone friends. Has anyone done this? How'd it work out?

I can get quite jealous & bitter.Being around people makes me feel worse. When I'm not around other people I feel a bit better because there's not as much to trigger those feelings. I've tried working on my life and tried things to manage or release the jealousness and bitterness but they haven't worked so it might be healthier for everyone if I didn't have irl friends.

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LoveTriumphsOverHate · 36-40, M

So, online friends are not irl friends? What's the difference? If you get jealous and bitter in person, why wouldn't you get jealous and bitter when talking to people online?

WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome · F

@LoveTriumphsOverHate That's a very good point. I think the distance makes it eaiser for me to monitor my thoughts and responses. Like I don't see or hear everything the same way I do with my irl friends. Perhaps if I continued and had longer term online friends the same thing might happen but I'm not sure. Thanks for your thoughts.

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Bonnie · 41-45, F

I've lived like this before. For years. It can work but you might get lonely.

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Bonnie · 41-45, F

@WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome I have social anxiety and anxiety disorder so it kind of wasn't really a choice . I wouldnt say I enjoyed it but just became used to living that way.

WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome · F

@Bonnie Social anxiety really sucks. x

Bonnie · 41-45, F

@WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome It does so much!

Mellowgirl · 31-35, F

This is my life except I have to work since I don't have a online or work from home job

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Mellowgirl · 31-35, F

@WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome it's really tough. I work part time and I hate it. The women I work with are cows. And the guy I'm working with is getting stroppy since I told him I may leave as they've already threatened "letting staff go!"

WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome · F

@Mellowgirl Argh. It's awful working with people you don't like.

Mellowgirl · 31-35, F

@WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome tbh he's doing something to better his career with a course that he will eventually make more money with. I'm just wasting myself there.

everyoneknows · 31-35, T

i did. doesnt work. i never held the friends for over 6 years. they were not real friends. idk its hard to explain . but offline i just cant either. but its more real. :/

LoveTriumphsOverHate · 36-40, M

@everyoneknows A good friend is difficult to come by. A lot of people have ulterior motives, but then there are some out there who are genuine and have a good heart. I gave up a lot of my friends when I was in my late 20s, and now I regret it.

SW-User

Well that was pretty much my last year thanks to Covid restrictions. I won't be continuing that, I need in person socialization.

WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome · F

@SW-User Due to Covid, in the past year I've seen three friends and I have no family in this country plus I'm estranged from my mother so it's the same as now but wondered what it would be like to continue.

Starchild1983 · 41-45, F

Have you tried therapy? They might be able to help you work through some of that stuff

WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome · F

@Starchild1983 I've seen around 20 therapists and been in and out of therapy for 30 years. I've tried multiiple medications, been an inpatient and out patient, group therapy, art therapy, family therapy... basically a lot of therapy. Still feel this way and it makes me even more bitter that the therapy hasn't helped but for some people it has lol.

Starchild1983 · 41-45, F

@WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome I’m sorry it has been such a struggle for you.. I hope you can find peace somehow

WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome · F

@Starchild1983 Thank you. That's very kind.

AndyH · M

Might get lonely when you can't talk with people like right there.

WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome · F

@AndyH Yeah that's what I'm afraid of. The problem is that I don't want to hurt other people or bring them down.

AndyH · M

@WeeWeeWeeAllTheWayHome That's cool. If they are friends and things are cool between you and them chances are good it will be okay.

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