I Will Move On When I'm Ready To Move On

Warning: Long rant.

Look I'm not giving up until my mom until she answers but she WONT. It doesn't seem to me she is interested in being a mom again. Since she deserted us, she wants nothing to do with us. Five days ago, as one of my bros was getting ready for work, I told him that the person from the hotel my mom lives in, said my mom is busy and isn't taking phone calls right now. I heard her voice in the background. It sounded like she was having fun. Busy my ass. I told my bro about it but he cut me off and said, "You know what? I am so sick and tired of you trying to call the woman that wants nothing to do with us and dumped us. Why can't you accept that mom cut us out of her life and move on? I moved on, Dad moved on, Seth (let's call him that) moved on and that's what you need to do. You really need to stop contacting her and MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE! You're 18 now and you don't need her. She stood you up, made you wait for four hours and she doesn't care! I gotta go to work, I don't have time for this and if mom doesn't wanna coop, then whatever. Her loss. I can't see with Mom's bullshit, she's a grown ass woman and she made a stupid ass choice. Stop posting "Happy Mother's Day" to mom. She doesn't deserve all that and of course people aren't going to like it anknowlege our mother and skip over your post. She didn't raise us! Parents raise their kids until they're 18. Mom left us as minors. Our aunt has been more of a mother to us but you fail to see that the ideal mother was right in front of you! She did so much to take care of her own kids and stepped in to be a mother figure to us, especially you since you're a young woman and need a female role model, but you don't seem to appriciate her at all and push her away. She is hurt because you keep praising a woman that just gave birth to us and left us. She isn't out mother! She just a coward who gave birth to us. You cant make her talk to you so YOU NEED TO STOP!" And he walked away and headed to work. He didn't have to yell at me like that.
My family said I need to go on with my life and leave that woman alone and stop trying to call her and I'm only making myself the victim by hurting myself. Stop calling her an strong woman because she isn't. Why can't people understand that I need my mommy? I haven't seen her since I was 9. 💔💔😭😭😢

Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M

She is never going to be what you want her to be.
As she's proven to you again and again and again.

Why ? Well it sounds like she was no more than a child (in her thinking) herself when she had you.

How can parents be this way ? Well, on that one you'll unlikely find the answer. Unless she has a moment of clarity and can understand it herself.

Parenting is hard work. Some folk just aren't cut out for it. They have too many wants and needs of their own that can't be met no matter WHAT they get up to in life.

Look at it this way. How many other people do you imagine she's met, gone through and left since you came along ?
18 years is a long time. I bet it runs into dozens ! Dozens of partners she may have told she loved and then for whatever reason, left. Inconsolable.

We all want our parents to be the people we imagine them to be.
And it's the saddest day in a child's life when we finally figure out they just never will be.

Time to take a deep breath. Consider those whom perhaps you've been treating poorly since you've had this obsession. Try and apologize. And then move on.
Because nothing will change for the better until you do.

ThePerfectUsername · 70-79, M

What @Picklebobble2 said Izzy. You mother simply isn't your mother and it doesn't look like she's any intention of being one. A mother supports you, tries to teach you right from wrong, they put food on the table every day and clean up after you. And from what I can see the only person you've ever had that does any of that has been your aunt. And the sooner you acknowledge that and start behaving like a daughter to your aunt the sooner you'll find peace.