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I Love a Good Quote

There was a lot going on at the lake. Indeed had we known how busy it was going to be, we either wouldn't have gone or we'd have taken a cine camera. You can have a picnic anywhere - the wasps will find you wherever you are.

Anyway this isn't about food or wasps.

A herd of pre-teens under the guidance of a beardie-weirdie were learning the basics of canoeing. "Parked" at the water's edge they were waggling their double-ended paddles about while beardie barked orders at them. Presumably this was lesson 1.
One microsecond before they got bored and started retaliating, beardie gave the first canoe a good shove with his sandalled foot. It slid in, amid whoops of joy. One after the other, the canoes got shoved, then gracefully slid out to a fully buoyant point. Meanwhile, the landlocked beardie mimed waggling double ended oars about to demonstrate (as if any of them needed to be told) what to do. The kids (remarkably) went along with it. They knew what to do with their elbows, and made a lot of noise, shrieking and suchlike, as they scattered across the surface of the water like pros. I'd swear they'd all done it before, they were so expert.

Then a couple of big boys with a two seater canoe came running to the shore, set down the canoe and - to the consternation and loud objections of beardie - got in.

Since the big boys weren't about to take any notice of beardie, he went to remonstrate that they were getting between him and his students, interrupting the lesson. Once again, they took no notice, so... he grabbed one of their paddles and ORDERED them to move along the shore. A tug of war ensued, watched by a growing cluster of spectators.

Words along the lines of "F off, you aren't the boss of me," were tossed around, and beardie was forced to allow himself to be yanked into the shallows. He knew everyone was watching, so he had to win. There was a principle at stake. The water was above the tops of his socks. Anyway, rightly or wrongly, he hung onto that paddle for all he was worth - and finally the front lad just let it go. Beardie wasn't expecting that. He was still tugging quite forcefully, stumbled backwards and landed on his back in a mixture of mud and wet shingle. It probably wasn't comfortable, especially as the paddle clobbered him during his descent.

He was quite oarstruck
ninjavu · 51-55, M
Your shaggy dog stories are terrible! I was laughing before your punchline though, at the water being above the tops of his socks.

I think you tell these stories just to deliver the punchline, but then I suppose that's what shaggy dog stories are.
ninjavu · 51-55, M
@damselfly Then you are clever on top of a good storyteller.
damselfly · 100+, F
@ninjavu and YOU are smooth 💕
ninjavu · 51-55, M
@damselfly Awww, thanks! Like a good whiskey? ;)
damselfly · 100+, F
Did you lose sympathy for beardie wearing socks with sandals?
SW-User

 
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