I Did Something I Regret
All of my life I have been struggling on losing weight since teenager. It causes me with bulimia, diet medicine, whenever advertisement talked about diet medicine. I will bought it as so on as possible. I am not skinny kid. I have been bullied about my apperance, weight even my family did it to me..I did not know what was bullimia until i found out on internet, my habit considered as bulimia. I showed eating foods in front of my parents but i went to bathroom to poke out my foods. I was successed on my diet and joined some of modelling class. But it was not longer then i gained weight again in senior high school. My weight loss just on and off.. I could not maintain my weight. Then I started my college years. I gained more and more weight. My sister told me to loss my weight otherwise none company would accept me worked in their company. So i began my diet so hard. I went to gym until midnight almost everyday and consumed green tea daily.. It was successed again and people said my body looks great. Even though I though I am not too obessed some of my friends still said I am fat.. That was sad.
A few years in my marriage I gained weight never been happen on my life stayed on this scale. I went to hospital it said I am obessed..I also have risk for pregnancy.. Its nightmare. I asked my husband to provide me gym member,nutrition doctor, slimming centre, sports equipments at our house, organic foods etc. But it was not worked for me. He felt giving up on me..
I could not stopped my addiction on foods especially unhealthy foods I love junkfood very much and spicy foods. If my husband warned me to stop my eating habits. I will argue with him until I said to him he did not accept me the way I am. He began to cried and said to me he did not want me getting sick and want to spend time with me longer. We both hugged each others and I was cried.. I promises to him I would stop my unhealthy foods. But I did it again and again. I Broke our promises so many times until God give me warned with GERD. I Felt like want to died. Its so hurt my stomach i could not walk, eat, etc thats miserable and traumatic..I could not taste my favourite foods. I cried inside my room. If I could looking back in my life. I wished could change my life habit and to be better person. My age 27 years now. I dont know i still could lose weight or not. Some of people said age is matters for lose weight. If you are younger your metabolism easier to lose weight. But I really wish I can make up all this. :(
A few years in my marriage I gained weight never been happen on my life stayed on this scale. I went to hospital it said I am obessed..I also have risk for pregnancy.. Its nightmare. I asked my husband to provide me gym member,nutrition doctor, slimming centre, sports equipments at our house, organic foods etc. But it was not worked for me. He felt giving up on me..
I could not stopped my addiction on foods especially unhealthy foods I love junkfood very much and spicy foods. If my husband warned me to stop my eating habits. I will argue with him until I said to him he did not accept me the way I am. He began to cried and said to me he did not want me getting sick and want to spend time with me longer. We both hugged each others and I was cried.. I promises to him I would stop my unhealthy foods. But I did it again and again. I Broke our promises so many times until God give me warned with GERD. I Felt like want to died. Its so hurt my stomach i could not walk, eat, etc thats miserable and traumatic..I could not taste my favourite foods. I cried inside my room. If I could looking back in my life. I wished could change my life habit and to be better person. My age 27 years now. I dont know i still could lose weight or not. Some of people said age is matters for lose weight. If you are younger your metabolism easier to lose weight. But I really wish I can make up all this. :(
