Why if a child doing bad things they put the fault or blame on the child's parents?

How stupid and irrelevance of that. Yes, they nurture the child since childhood but when the child is adult, it is already out of their hands to control their kid.

I hate when elders blaming the parents because of the sins that was made by the child.

I do sins. Blame on me, shame on me. Not them. They have nothing to do with my deeds.

They aren't perfect but ain't bad either. The world is not about black and white. There is grey lies between it.

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SW-User

Reminds me of my brother-in-laws. They are all messed up from head to toe. I wouldn’t blame the parents completely, but they were enablers. They tolerated and raised them with disrespect. Kids raised with disrespect would never know the value of respect. As adults they just find those things normal and are not willing to change.

iamelijah · 26-30, M

@SW-User Hmmm. Fair enough.

4meAndyou · F

I think that to which those elders were referring was call an improper or lenient upbringing.

For example, My mother slapped me across the face, really hard, whenever I did anything wrong. I grew up very quiet, filled with hatred and resentment toward her, and the one goal of my life was to get away from her...and my brother's goal was the same.

BUT...I will say this. Between the abusive slapping and the training I received at church, I didn't do too much that was wrong while living at home. I waited till I was an adult. But neither was I "spoiled".

If my mother tried to slap me like that in today's society, she would probably be in jail. In the USA, liberalism and child protective services negated the whole biblical concept of "spare the rod and spoil the child".

iamelijah · 26-30, M

@4meAndyou Discipline can be harsh at young I admit my childhood wasn't sunshine either. But, I am doing well without harming others life and I am still heard the rumors around me and linked my dirty deeds with my parents. I hate they (people in my community) always bring my parents'name into every conversation... when I do bad things or misbehave.

And I feel bad they (my parents) got tainted too because of my fault.

HairbrushDiva · 31-35, F

[i]"Why if a child doing bad things [b]they[/b] put the fault or blame on the child's parents?"[/i]

Who are "they"?

iamelijah · 26-30, M

@HairbrushDiva People. The society.

Let me give an example.

I do drugs.

People: "Bet their parents didn't taught her well."

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