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I Am Not the Same Person I Used to Be

Your name used to be
A song upon my lips
I remember
Your passion for life
I recall that look
In your brown eyes
We were together
A fresh new start for me
For you, I was a woman
Who thought I knew Love
What did I know? Nothing...
There were years
Long, long, lonely years
Too few smiles
Far more tears
I lost myself
I searched for myself
I found I needed
To be Free
I found the courage
To move on
Without you
With me
Can I forgive you
For this experiment
No, perhaps someday, yes
I will never die
That way again
I live now
I will forget you
I never will forget
Me...
NocturnalTide · 46-50, M
You let go and moved on to grow. To stay anchored to him you would have perished. Even if you can't forgive, try not to stay angry; the anger will only hurt you. Change can lead to new life.
You have no idea what he did to me, Nocturnal. I still have flashes of anger in the memories. It became abusive physically in the end and I had to call upon the police a few times. And he unraveled mentally too. I purge by talking and by counting my blessings. Change is positive for me especially now. Thank you for your kindness.
Carissimi · 70-79, F
You've put (very well) into words how it feels. May we all never forget ourselves again. 💐
Hi, Carissimi. I was young when we met. 19. I knew nothing of the world. I learned over time it was him, not me. I am happier now then in my entire life. I got a second chance after 3 decades because I wanted my happiness. I love life. Thank you so much. I think women tend to lose themselves more easily than men do. It is because we nurture others so much.
Carissimi · 70-79, F
@PoetryNEmotion: True, we do forget ourselves. I'm glad you found happiness. I have not, but have accepted that this is how it is.
@Carissimi: Why haven't you, dear girl? I am curious. PM me if you wish. Happiness is possible. How may I help you?
sunrisehawk · 61-69, M
Mingled with the sadness and disappointments of this world are moments of joy, excitement, and expectation.

Choosing to live rather than merely to wait for the inevitable demonstrates your courage, power, and choice of action.

It matters not who forgets or forgives, but the choice to live is the only one that matters.

Your words are telling.
I only created this as my memories went back for a few minutes. I am most fine and very happy, Hawkman. I did what had to be done to be Free after decades of dissatisfaction and a cold marriage. I loved your 3rd sentence. Thank you ever so much. :)
diablesse · 56-60, F
beautifully expressed my friend.
Thank you, love. :)
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It is hard to forgive a man who stole from me. He caused such pain, such sorrow purposely in the end. It still effects me. I have an amazing son and I have valuable lessons. I will lose his memory in time. Forgiveness is something I will explore. 3 decades is a long time, friend.
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@MatureWomanLover: Your heart is in the right place, but you needn't suffer for me nor my past mistakes. I am spiritual. Thank you, friend.
berangere · 80-89, F
I can say that I am far from the person I used to be,even not so long ago.

 
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