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I Am Scared of Relationships

I don’t want to be in a relationship. My past relationships, I was hurt constantly. Was constantly put down. Verbal and emotional abuse. Told what to wear and how to style my hair. Worried if I wasn’t good enough. Always trying to please him. Even after he’s brought me down. Constantly talking about my weight, my hair, my clothes, any and everything. Making me feel like I was nothing. All of this trying to control me. When talks of marriage sounded like nothing but some prison to where he could own me. Make me feel like a slave. You would think that I’ve learned the first time. But to my surprise, get hurt again, the exact same way.

I can’t do this again. Not to myself. While my children watch. I can’t do this to them either. I would rather be single for the rest of my life, than to be in some worthless relationship. My kids come first.

And right now, I am very happy. I’m happy to be on my own, single and loving life. Just me and my babies.

Nobody telling me how to look. I can be beautiful and look beautiful by myself. I can love myself by myself. If I ever decide to date again, which I doubt, but if, there’d have to be a sign letting me know this guy is the one. Because I refuse to let anybody into my life, breaking my true happiness. I don’t have time for it.
Greymatter1001 · 56-60, M
Reading your post it seems to me that the problem isn't relationships but who you get into a relationship with. Not all men are the way you describe. There are a lot of men who just want a partner not a slave. We want you to do what makes you happy, and hope we are part of that happiness.
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@Greymatter1001 thank you for your kind words and support. I am also happy with being on my own. Especially when it comes to being a mom.
Greymatter1001 · 56-60, M
I think that is the key, is not needing anyone to make you happy. Also someone that is happy and secure is more likely to attract people who are also happy and secure.
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@Greymatter1001 true. Thank you!
TheGoodGuy · M
Not every guy is like that, there r a lot of good guys out there. I'm in a similar situation where I stop myself from getting into a relationship but for different reasons. Also my beliefs have changed and now I'm a strict no sex before marriage, but I miss it so I'm weighing up the options. Don't u miss it?
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@TheGoodGuy very true.
TheGoodGuy · M
@NaturalBeautyQueen in that case.. you're welcome! ☺
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
firefall · 61-69, M
Relationships don't have to be like that. But if your choice is that sort of controlling prick, or being solo, being solo sounds like the right choice.
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@firefall thank you
firefall · 61-69, M
@NaturalBeautyQueen hope life keeps getting better for you.
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
Thank you @firefall
Raffie · 61-69, F
There are benefits to being single. Marriage is not for anyone, especially in today's world.

So much emotional hurt, not worth it unless the relationship is genuine.
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@Raffie marriage is definitely not for me. I realized that from my last relationship. When I dealt with abuse from my ex family.
Eddiesolds · 61-69, M
This is sad!You are so better off!Sounds like a piece of shit to me! You are beautiful just the way you are.My ex was very controlling.Thank God I'm out!!
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@Eddiesolds thank you. I’m glad you’re out too. I hope you find true happiness as well.
PTCdresser57 · 61-69, M
Good for you! No woman should get hurt or put up with that from a man. Women are to be loved...cherished and taken care of.
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@PTCdresser57 I agree. Thank you!
rickoo164 · 56-60, M
I wish you ( I guess like many others ) a lot of happinnes in your new life style...
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@rickoo164 thank you.
rickoo164 · 56-60, M
@NaturalBeautyQueen Be strong, it will not be a long way of happinness all the time but at least it's your own way....
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@rickoo164 I appreciate that :)
Powerful words. I pray you find happiness
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@drtt943 thank you!
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sighmeupforthat · 46-50, M
@tupolevtu144 i was wondering that also. some people get families then things break down and it's impossible to maintain..

especially if someone gets sick in the family and needs special care.
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
@sighmeupforthat I have plenty of love and support from my own family. Plus I have great kids. They’re well behaved.
i never know what to do with mine. Do i tell them on the 1st date or wait until we get more interment. Both have never worked so i give up

 
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