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I Am Scared of Relationships

I wish I was heartless so I wouldn't have to feel like I can't ever be enough for you. I wish I didn't care about how you feel so I wouldn't have to hurt with you. I love you, but I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to be my father, but every time I look in the mirror I see him. I'm either in pain, causing pain, or watching others around me writhe in pain. I wish I could say I'm ok but I'm not, and I'm not sure if I'll ever be. You deserve better. I'm sorry.

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Miram · 31-35, F

You should take care of yourself before anyone else. And once you are standing on strong footing, you can have others join in.

Relationships can change you permanently. They are the only other reference we have besides our relationships with parents. They will affect you, you will remember every abusive word anyone you let that close emotionally have said to you and you to them. You may carry that package for years from a heart to another. And the failures of those relationships always dragging you down maybe even affecting other life aspects.

I know young men suffering the same.

You can love without the commitment. Love is about the other person and it doesn't have to be tied to any expectations. You should love you too though. But it's a process, it takes time.

You are not helpess. You can mold you to your liking.

InvictusIndigo · 22-25, M

@Miram Thank you so much for your wisdom! This is definitely going into my journal :)

TrinityLuv · 41-45, F

If she loves you you should tell her.....she would want to help you

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