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I Am Afraid of Failure

[b]The Old Woman Who Swollowed a Pill[/b]


The Dr. was called after I started to yell:
"This drug is ruining me!"
“It’s sending me to Neurological Hell!”
His nurse replied:
"Side effects never last very long."
They were wrong!

Fifteen days later, he admitted in my records:
"Failed on Gabapentin, caused up in tremors."
"She's a little upset about this."
For goodness sakes, my body was having quakes!

He didnt share with others about my horrible reaction.
Two months passed by, I woke up to find my right thumb had pulled stiffly over my palm. How was I supposed to manage without my dominant hand?

The coverup went from bad to worse.
The Dr. said, "There are no reports of Gabapentin causing this."
They concocted a story that I had developed a psychosis while my husband and son took a motorcycle tour that my daughter in law told a doctors employee about. I can watch the video of them riding down the Moki Dugway, a very steep, winding gravel road, without feeling a bit scared.

Then my doctor sent me to a neurologist who wouldn't come near me.
That Dr. talked to my husband about his recent motorcycle trip. Perhaps I looked a little bit pissed off, since I wasn’t even examined.
Then I was passed off to a neurosurgeon.

The neurosurgeon took one look at me and said, "This isn't my specialty, you need to see a hand specialist, but I will order a brain MRI."
After my brain MRI, he claimed my results weren't in yet.
There was really a 5 mm lesion on my hypothalamus gland that he cleverly avoided by recording:
“Seems Supratentorial to me, after all I’m not a psychiatrist.” What an idiotic statement!

After 8 years we switched to a new doctor who said, " I want my friend, a world renowned neurosurgeon to see you.
That doctor sent in his Physician’s Assistant to tell me, “You were probably born with that white spot.” (As if it’s a natural occurrence) After asking to see the doctor, he admitted my movement disorder needed to be addressed.
Little did he know two Fellow doctors were conspiring against him to have him ousted from being the head of that Neuroscience Institute, so his referral wasn’t honored.
Instead, I was given to a different type of doctor who walked in the exam room with a diagnostic pamphlet attached to her clipboard.
She showed me from my recent brain MRI, the white non-enhancing area and said, “That’s your hypothalamus gland.”
I asked her, “Isn’t the hypothalamus gland also connected to the Basal Ganglia?” She said, “No, it’s not. That would only cause an endocrine problem, but your problem is psychological.” Then she said, “If you stop thinking about your idea that Gabapentin caused your abnormal movements, they would go away.”
Wrong thing to say lady!
I told her, “My neurologist told me at my second appointment, “You have the worst case of Ballism I have ever seen.” “I shouldn’t have had to buy a Neurology book to learn, “A vascular cause of Ballism is an infarction affecting the subthalamic nucleus or its connections.”

She abruptly stopped my appointment, “You can ask for a copy of your appointment records at the desk” and rushed down a long hallway.
I realized she had pre-recorded my records before ever seeing me. She also ignored the radiologist’s recommendation of: “Clinical Correlation Advised,” which means she should have ordered an EEG and EMG nerve study. The pamphlet she gave me even states, “all scans and other investigations are normal.”
I need to make a report to my state’s Medical Board now that I found the reason why my nervous system was ruined since her pamphlet stated my condition was, “Functional Neurological Syndrome.”
An online doctor gave an excellent explanation on YouTube:
“The Motor Circuit of the Basal Ganglia - Function vs. Dysfunction.”
It proves that the subthalamic nucleus is part of the circuitry, and she should have known it.
Excuse me for going on and on about this drug but I’ve found that it’s getting away with hurting many people and now doctors are using it as a replacement for opioids.
Do your research before taking this drug, or any other one, so you can make an informed decision.
Boshie · 70-79, F
I am hoping that I have finally found someone who can help me.
I found a video on YouTube of this neurosurgeon giving a lecture to resident doctors. I was very impressed .
LadyWioness · 56-60, F
First of all, I'm sorry that you're going through this. You're not a failure, because you didn't know this would happen. I hope they can help you.

 
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