I Miss Someone Very Much
This story, these reasons might sound silly for some, and for some it will make sense. I actually do not know what it sounds like to me, because it still feels so unreal.
A few months ago he appeared as if out of thin air. I suddenly noticed him and from that moment my mind wouldn't shut up about him. I couldn't concentrate on anything else. But as unexpected as it was I could a few months later call this amazing wierdo mine. For the first time I felt as someone wanted me the same way I wanted them. You see, my history with bullying and feeling unwanted is long and then to have someone to say that he wants me, that he chooses me. It is unreal to me and I am afraid to wake up from this dream.
That was about a month ago, when we first were official. But two days after that I was going on a three week trip where I basically went under the radar (no connection with the world at home). It was of cource hard, I missed him and our timing was the best... But you havent heard all of it... In the beginning of this week I saw him once, but now he is on a trip for another 3 weeks... Wow the timing is amazing... Long distance the first 1,5 months...
This summer is agonizing... Every time we see eachother is like a goodbye... You know that hug when you never want to let go... you just want to spare that moment when all that exists is you, but then the reality hits you and you have to let go... The second you separate from that hug is so... difficult, it feels like you are leaving yourself at that moment.
This is where some might find it silly... But for me it's reality and it is agonizing...
I miss him so much... It just stings sometimes, but at times it comes like a tidal wave and suddenly I am drowning and at that moment I miss him so much...
I know that many people have it so much worse... with a whole sea seperating them and their loved ones, not seeing eachother for years. In comparison this sounds silly. But for me this is so new, so beautiful but alien.
I miss someone very much, I miss him...
A few months ago he appeared as if out of thin air. I suddenly noticed him and from that moment my mind wouldn't shut up about him. I couldn't concentrate on anything else. But as unexpected as it was I could a few months later call this amazing wierdo mine. For the first time I felt as someone wanted me the same way I wanted them. You see, my history with bullying and feeling unwanted is long and then to have someone to say that he wants me, that he chooses me. It is unreal to me and I am afraid to wake up from this dream.
That was about a month ago, when we first were official. But two days after that I was going on a three week trip where I basically went under the radar (no connection with the world at home). It was of cource hard, I missed him and our timing was the best... But you havent heard all of it... In the beginning of this week I saw him once, but now he is on a trip for another 3 weeks... Wow the timing is amazing... Long distance the first 1,5 months...
This summer is agonizing... Every time we see eachother is like a goodbye... You know that hug when you never want to let go... you just want to spare that moment when all that exists is you, but then the reality hits you and you have to let go... The second you separate from that hug is so... difficult, it feels like you are leaving yourself at that moment.
This is where some might find it silly... But for me it's reality and it is agonizing...
I miss him so much... It just stings sometimes, but at times it comes like a tidal wave and suddenly I am drowning and at that moment I miss him so much...
I know that many people have it so much worse... with a whole sea seperating them and their loved ones, not seeing eachother for years. In comparison this sounds silly. But for me this is so new, so beautiful but alien.
I miss someone very much, I miss him...
