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I Am Different [Being Different]

A common misconception about what I'm doing here (and elsewhere) is that I'm looking for someone who is like me, who I can relate to. SW, like EP before it, often feels like a whole network of support groups, people with similar problems bonding and helping each other... I understand that. There is great value in such a concept, no doubt. Also, when I initially joined EP it was most definitely what (or who) I was looking for.

Over the years my priorities have changed. You see, finding someone like me, with similar problems or a similar mindset, has proven to be so close to impossible that I treat it as such. So what am I doing here? Well, I've shifted to looking for people that don't necessarily understand or 'get' me, but who are comfortable enough in their own skin that they can let me be comfortable in mine. I like myself, and the skin I inhabit.

But, you ask, is that really your only requirement? Doesn't that apply to a ton of people? Alas, it's more difficult to find than it seems. Things often go right for a while, but given some time inevitably hidden feelings surface, deeply ingrained distaste against one or more facets of my personality or lifestyle. Distaste that makes no rational sense, mind you, and when challenged literally none of the people managed to defend it.

'Live and let live', a phrase many preach, yet few practice. Looking down on me is so popular you could market it and become a billionaire, which makes my mission difficult. You see, in order to be liked in this world one must either have a lot in common with others (I certainly do not) or to be cool enough that people like you despite, or perhaps even for being different (I certainly am not). I never really tried to do or be either.

I feel like I have something to offer that many people need, but very few realize they need. It's hard to help someone who doesn't want to be helped, but way harder to help someone who is convinced they don't need the help in the first place. Given these problems I've suspended my lifelong dream of trying to actually change the world for the better, at least in a big way. I need more resources, and likely the help of others.

Let me try to get back to where I was going with all this. I don't care how different you are from me. Age, race, gender, profession, beliefs... I could not care less. I'm looking for people who have an open mind. Who not only don't judge others just for having a different opinion or lifestyle, but embrace the variety and try to learn from it. I don't mind difficult. People can be difficult and still be worth it. I know this, because I am.
PoizonApple · 41-45, F
Bravo, however, I wish you had included what was so controversial about your opinions or lifestyle so we can make a determination if we might be a match for you. I am extremely open-minded, but if you eat babies or go leech squirting for fun, I might not be your ideal companion.
thinkincubes · 41-45
If it was just one thing, I likely would have done that, but it's not. "What makes you so different?" is a complicated question without an easy answer. I'm not secretive about any of it though, I imagine in time the sum of everything I write on here will form a picture that approaches the reality.
PoizonApple · 41-45, F
@TragicMonkey: Oh, I just read your "about me" where you outlined it. :)
SW-User
I think I got a bit lost half way through and I'm still in a muddle...

I think you're saying you want to exist free from judgement... but it does make me wonder what judgement has befallen you...

Life is full of judgement. We judge how and if to respond right here in this space.

We judge what harm we may cause or prevent.

We judge ourselves.

See I got in a middle again now.

Don't think I know my point or yours.

It's a bad day by the way...
SW-User
Yes but what box do you get put in?
thinkincubes · 41-45
Man, I've been put in so many boxes it's impossible to even remember them all. 'Loser', 'Bum', 'Leech', 'Liar', 'Narcissist', 'Fake', 'Cruel', 'Racist', 'Naive', 'Hopeless', ... The list goes on.
SW-User
I think I have not been out in many boxes because I mostly evade capture
Peaches · F
Very well written, I enjoyed reading this. Well, I'll except your help....just like the song goes, "I'd love to change the world, but I don't know what to do?!" We may not always agree, but I don't see why it would stop any of us from being friends, having a different opinion is what makes the world go 'round. 😉
Peaches · F
@TragicMonkey: It's like a fine wine....mellows with age, or is that whiskey?!
thinkincubes · 41-45
I'm not a connaisseur 😅
Peaches · F
@TragicMonkey: That's good, I don't drink whiskey, a little vino once in a while. Beer is good.
SW-User
I really like this post.
Most of us, especially most of us who do not fit into any cliques or norms want to be accepted for who we are. And who we are is 'different'. Which is surprisingly hard for most people to accept or have patience for.
And most of us get tired of being rejected for this difference so we stop trying.
thinkincubes · 41-45
Some of us, though, persist!
SW-User
@TragicMonkey: Good. :)
TheLoveAge · 36-40, F
This describes the man I fell in love with. I'm glad I found this. Thank you. And continue to be yourself. Relating is good but don't compromise your character and what you feel guided to do. I understand this better than I can explain it but I'm so glad I found this story. Thank you so much again.
thinkincubes · 41-45
I will :) You keep spreading the love. ❤
TheLoveAge · 36-40, F
@TragicMonkey: Thank you💕
Peaceful · F
I like the stuff you write here. You seem more introspective than a lot of people. This intrigues me. I'm open minded about most everything. I have a harder time with people that hurt others intentionally. Or even themselves. But I still try to be kind to them too. I hope you find what you are looking for.
Well expressed. Thank you so much for sharing.🙂
thinkincubes · 41-45
Thank *you* for reading ;)
SW-User
hmm.. I agree.. how come the username, tragicmonkey?
thinkincubes · 41-45
The duality of existence... a tragic comedy... I'm a sad clown. Plus, I hate animal cruelty and dedicated my name to the legacy of Caesar from Rise of the Planet of the Apes.
SW-User
Well explained 👍
SimplyTracie · 26-30, F
We're all different. It's as simple as that. 😆
thinkincubes · 41-45
If only getting along was equally simple.
SimplyTracie · 26-30, F
Be nice if everyone just let others do their own thing. Imagine that.
rottenrobi · 56-60, F
You are a very interesting monkey!
JaggedLittlePill · 46-50, F
You are quite intriguing...I enjoy reading your thoughts ...in turn, it gets me thinking.

 
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