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I Have Something to Say

Overwhelmed by grief.. bitterness.. and a darkening sense of lonliness.

I really really don't know why I think these things. But, they all can rest easy if I leave right now.

She found someone else. So I don't need to stick around any more. And the last flame has been blown out; your last wish.. shall be granted.

There is nobody else out there for me. Not because they aren't compatible with me, nor because they won't love, but because your dying breath breathed life into the chains that bind me to that vow. But in keeping that vow from now.. a life without her.. without you. Holds no meaning. Nothing. I feel empty now. And nothing can re-light this candle.

I have so many accomplices.. but so few friends. And noone that I could trust to even begin to comprehend me.

If you're going to send comments telling me to grow up or kill myself or its not the end of the world.. I've heard them all millions of times. Don't waste your time any more than you have wasted reading all of my trash.
kayoshin · 36-40, M
That's cute, poetic like. Time will help or it won't, just don't look back too much people are biologically hardwired to forget bad things and remember Good things (that's what makes us recover from traumatic events) but the flaw in this mechanism is we idealise things the more time passes (think about old people always praising the Good old days) you will put this woman on a pedestal that no real woman can reach not even herself and it will cause you misery. Try to accept the end, accept her flaws and her choices, realise there is someone better out there not necessarily better than her but better than her for you. Don't let a failed romance overshadow your future romances or you might just stare happiness in the eyes and give it a pass because you are hanging on to a dead dream.
kayoshin · 36-40, M
What promise if not too indescrete?
If I mentioned it, many would scoff at me. What kind of person would even 'agree' to keep such a promise - well, obviously me. So, I will not be disclosing it. Sorry.
kayoshin · 36-40, M
OK, you take care and try to take things a little lighter, the world doesn't need more martyrs :)
SW-User
That's not trash. I see authenticity and humble bravery to speak your truth. Admirable.
It's a small spark of happiness.. to see that someone can see something other than rubbish in that extract. Thank you.
SW-User
@Samael:
Keep writing. You shared something great. It resonates with me.☺
Findingmeagain71 · 51-55, F
Life isn't always easy and its very rarely fair. You may never love again but you are still here. And the pain may never go away, but it will become a part of who you are as you find a way to keep going. Never give up
Findingmeagain71 · 51-55, F
I know how much some kindness has meant to me the past couple days
Findingmeagain71 · 51-55, F
How are you today?
I'm having a rough one. I know what you mean by sometimes you don't wanna get up because you're tired.
Just as empty. :/ Could barely sleep, haven't eaten anything significant in over 24hrs.
Fussybear · 31-35, F
I understand exactly how you feel... Come here (🐼Hug)
I wish I could.. But chains bind me to where I stand. I appreciate the sentiment, though.
Fussybear · 31-35, F
I'll come stand beside you and we'll figure something out

 
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