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How does one who’s very shy become an extrovert?

I’m a SUPER shy person, I would love to be a social butterfly but I don’t know how. I’m a very awkward person and I hate it
Poet626 · 31-35, M
You don't have to be a social butterfly...there are strengths and weaknesses to both introversion and extroversion. Maybe you could make a plan to talk to one new person per day. You could start with small talk, such as talking about the weather, asking how their day is going.

If social skills don't come easily to you, you could research ways to understand social cues. You could find a hobby you enjoy and try to make friends through that. But don't put yourself down for being introverted. You just have to learn to balance things out a bit. :)

You could also read Susan Cain's book "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking."

https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/dp/0307352153/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?keywords=the+power+of+quiet+susan+cain&qid=1560545676&s=gateway&sprefix=the+power+of+quiet+s&sr=8-1
I read that book. Very good book. @Poet626
Poet626 · 31-35, M
@Spoiledbrat awesome! I enjoyed it as well. I tend to be introverted in regards to my energy management (being around lots of people saps my energy), but at the same time I absolutely love to meet new people and want to introduce myself to everyone on earth. 😁
make yourself miserably uncomfortable by putting yourself out there and dealing with people on a daily basis. You will learn a lot.
I don’t mind those actually. I just pretend to be someone else( in my head) and do things that I would never do. Such as, talk to people. Pretend to give a damn. Solicit opinions of people I think are idiots. I ask questions that I already know the answers to and pretend to be interested in their reply. @RemovedUsername679448
RemovedUsername679448 · 46-50, M
@TwiddlerofThumbs tell me more haha
🤗 you’re an asshole too. That’s so darling. @RemovedUsername679448
Caprice · 41-45, F
Repeated exposure to social situations. The more you do it, the easier it becomes. Not saying it will ever be easy, but it gets less terrifying.
SW-User
@Caprice for some that increaces anxiety...why can't you be shy?
Not a disease 😁
Caprice · 41-45, F
Possibly, but only one way to find out🤷🏻‍♀️
I don’t think there is anything wrong at all with being shy! She asked how she could try to become less shy, and this is the method that has worked best for me:) @SW-User
JP1119 · 36-40, M
Shy and introvert are not the same thing. Being introverted just means that social interaction drains your energy, not that you're afraid to be social or that you don't like being social. For example, Jim Carey is an introvert, but you wouldn't say he's shy, would you? I don't know how to fix shyness, but you can't change whether you're an introvert or extrovert. However introverted/extroverted you are when you're a toddler, that's how introverted/extroverted you'll be when you die no matter what you do.
I can “fake” a certain amount of gregariousness in social situations, as I learned to (with practice) in the corporate world. But it was playing a role—I’m still an introvert at heart and to those who know me best. That hasn’t changed. 🙂
SW-User
@bijouxbroussard And that's fine 🤗
Viper · M
I'm the same way.

Only way I know of, is to challenge and dare yourself and hold yourself accountable.


Say this week you have to talk to 1 new person you don't know and the conversation has to go on for at least 2 mins.


Then keep growing those numbers, and see what others talk about...

I know some can talk about movies, music, work, food, travel, etc...

I can only really talk about work and food, but changeling myself to grow even more.
Summersrain · 51-55, F
Realize that most people are pretty unsure of themselves
calicuz · 51-55, M
Just talk to people like you would your friends.
elafina · 36-40, F
Allow yourself to be a little silly, and express what you truly have in mind without judging it.
Because you don't want just to be social, but to be social being you :)
I was like that and i made it and changed. Sure i need longer time than others to 'empty' myself out of the social situations, but it's worth it..
Dino11 · M
A little at a time.
Viper · M
@Dino11 yes little by little!
Effloresce · 26-30, F
You should read Quiet by Susan Cain
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RemovedUsername679448 · 46-50, M
You can just force yourself to go out more and strike up conversations with strangers. It's not easy but just try it once or twice and you'll get the hang of it....or truly hate it
I don’t think it’s possible because it’s just who are. There’s nothing wrong with being an introvert.
DonaldTrumpet · 70-79, M
GetZ In touCH witHz u maLez sides
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DonaldTrumpet · 70-79, M
@FrankietheFly Thztz the poinTz LadY BOI
Reject · 26-30, M
You have to want it enough to step out of your comfort zone.
Closed mouth never gets feed
SW-User
You are who you are
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