how can i let all these go and simply enjoy to be loved even in the most peculiar ways?

he's so dirty, like he is sitting everywhere on the floor and everyplace, he's sweating all the time and showers once a day but still...he's petting all the animals around and grabs whatever he founds and never washes his hands...he's like a child in a sense.
And like a child again, he wants me his in a way i'm not used to. I appreciate my freedom and the way he wants me his, gets in the way of my sense for freedom. And he's friends with all the underground people it makes me uncomfortable. He's been some months in prison too, even though he didn't do anything really that bad. His mother is crazy, but for real.
It's like i've totally returned to my teenage years, choosing that kind of guy, but with my experience, i cannot really choose him.