Are you the key under the mat?

No. I don't allow myself to be used.

The key under the mat is reserved for emergencies. Sometimes people come to me in true need. I'm more than ok with that.

I am the sandwich in the fridge when you're hungry and don't want to cook

No, I don't play that anymore

Yea the lock is very strangely shaped

I am the key master, are you the gatekeeper?

Depends if I want to be. Sometimes it prevents pain.