I Like to Write About How I Feel

As soon as I felt that it might turn into an argument, I backed off. I did not want to spend a single second on stuff like that. I never wanted it. And as soon as I backed off, I remembered so many moments in the darkness of my memories where I just faded into nothingness. Where I just backed off. Maybe I was scared. Scared of losing people I love, scared of hurting them with my words and behavior and myself. It was just so easy to lose. It did not feel good and it did not feel right then.
But today, I realized that me backing off was not losing. I was just standing for what I believe in. I was just protecting myself and my beliefs from shattering into infinite pieces. Because I believe, no one is bad. Everyone in this world is just trying their ways to be happy, to feel secure, to stand for what they believe in. And I am just one of them. I believe that it is better to stay quiet than to provoke an argument by talking too much. And arguments are the first phase of destruction.
I want peace and when I hold on to my thoughts and beliefs, I feel peace.
A line by Kahlil Gibran comes to mind, “ We only talk when we cease to be in peace with our thoughts.”