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Roadsterrider · 56-60, M
I forgive everyone who I perceive has wronged me. I can't afford to lose sleep over holding onto a grudge. Forgiving someone does not mean that I will continue to allow them into my life to create more drama.
An example: My mother passed away a few years ago, my younger sister was the administrator of her will. My mother talked to me before her passing, she was concerned about how my sister wanted to change her will against her wishes. Basically what my sister wanted was to exclude me from the will unless I was willing to pay her for what I wished to receive. There was a piece of property divided half to me and half to her. The home place was to belong to both of us. The property I was to inherit had been promised to me by my Dad before he passed and Mom continued with that plan. I tried to discuss the issue with my sister and she wasn't enough of an adult at 47 to explain why she thought I should be removed from the will unless I paid her. A lawyer convinced her that she should stick to the will as written and I got my land. I lost sleep over it, I was angry and irritable, she didn't care that I was upset about the issue. So, I did some serious soul searching and forgave her, set it aside and eliminated her from my life. I don't hold any grudge against her and if she asked for help, I would help. She isn't going to be in my life to cause problems later though. Me being angry and irritable only affects me and the loved ones around me, not the person I am angry at. I can't afford that excess baggage.
An example: My mother passed away a few years ago, my younger sister was the administrator of her will. My mother talked to me before her passing, she was concerned about how my sister wanted to change her will against her wishes. Basically what my sister wanted was to exclude me from the will unless I was willing to pay her for what I wished to receive. There was a piece of property divided half to me and half to her. The home place was to belong to both of us. The property I was to inherit had been promised to me by my Dad before he passed and Mom continued with that plan. I tried to discuss the issue with my sister and she wasn't enough of an adult at 47 to explain why she thought I should be removed from the will unless I paid her. A lawyer convinced her that she should stick to the will as written and I got my land. I lost sleep over it, I was angry and irritable, she didn't care that I was upset about the issue. So, I did some serious soul searching and forgave her, set it aside and eliminated her from my life. I don't hold any grudge against her and if she asked for help, I would help. She isn't going to be in my life to cause problems later though. Me being angry and irritable only affects me and the loved ones around me, not the person I am angry at. I can't afford that excess baggage.
riseofthemachine · 41-45, M
Ties That Bind..
When Two human desires are particularly strong: the desire to punish wrongdoers, and the desire to protect loved ones. When these drives come into conflict—and family members, partners, or close friends are the wrongdoers— how do you respond?
When Two human desires are particularly strong: the desire to punish wrongdoers, and the desire to protect loved ones. When these drives come into conflict—and family members, partners, or close friends are the wrongdoers— how do you respond?
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Roadsterrider · 56-60, M
@Hayman Right is right and wrong is wrong, I can't side with anyone who is going down the wrong path. I have pulled my wife aside, my children aside, and explained that I can't be a party to whatever they are doing. My children respect it, they have all came to me at some point in their adult life and apologized and thanked me for staying the line. My wife on the other hand thinks I should be on her side no matter what, and she has a big mouth sometimes.
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Karmalives · 51-55, M
rachelsj · 22-25, F
Forgiveness is a healing tool