Ever feel like you have nothing more to lose?

At a point in time, life in general. There is a quote by JK Rowling, which resonated so loudly for me:

[b][i]"rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life" [/i] [/b]

....and so it was for me too.

No, if I thought that I'd be scared god, sitting up in the clouds would hear my thought and say, "oh you thing so eh?"

My divorce but that was a win for me.

Sometimes.

My ex.

walking home from work one day, i witnessed an innocent pedestrian get hit by a car that ran a red light. i called 9-1-1 and stayed with her until EMS arrived. but the whole time i felt nothing. not shock, or fear, or anger, or sadness,.. i felt nothing. if anything, i felt inconvenienced by this near loss of human life. only a little inconvenienced, b/c i had nothing to go home to and no one i wanted to see. i went home, crawled into bed wearing my clothes and just lay there all night. in the morning, i saw a doctor and started therapy for depression. i've fought against darkness ever since. one time, the darkness almost won. but, i keep fighting, b/c some day (soon) life will start to mean something...