I Am Confused About My Feelings

I am grieved by the man who hurt me intentionally and repeatedly and seriously, because I never got to nor will ever get to make things right with him....Part of me grieves, part of me doesn't care less about him....Maybe it's not me who needs to kiss ass, maybe it's him who needs to do some serious oppologizing, maybe I need to too and explain that the devil made me do it.....Maybe we will never get the chance to make our peace, so much unfinished buisness, and I just couldn't care less...Or do I? I don't know I'm confused.