I’ve started craving old stuff I’ve thought I’ve left behind. I want OxyContin. I want Xanax. I want Codine. And I want a bottle fireball to wash it all down with.
I relapsed many times when I was your age your habits have not cost you more then your willing to pay yet when they cost you everything you love then you get your priorities in order and stop craving stupid high's But I have buried a lot of friends that never learned I guess I am the blessed one Clean and Sober 24 plus years ,,,the desire to get high is gone
I haven’t really been craving these things for the past seven years. Now that my wife wants to leave me its the only thing that makes me feel it will help. It won’t solve anything, I’m well aware of that. But it will make waiting on her decision a little easier. And hey if I fuck up and die then HEY! Happy accident @rckt148
@Knucklez you can go to a doctor and get meds for the separation anxiety I lost my first wife and 3 kids at 23 over my addictions I lost my second wife over them at 34 7 yrs ago I lost the love of my life ,,ended up having a heart attack and getting put in a nut ward ,,,I hadn't eat in 30 days ,,they said I was trying to starve myself to death ,,,but I refused to let her make me relapse
I wanted to die ,,I had my gun out more then once I still love her ,,,but its over I could not win any of my wives back
But now I am happy I did not toss my life away over a women Now I have lots of women wishing they could be with me But now I like being single ,,,and all the women that left me now wish they hadn't Harming yourself only confirms you were the loser moving one and doing better ,,proves they gave up to soon
You want a life too don't you? I would say don't visit any users today. Some that have quit smoking like to attend around smokers and breathe inn the second hand smoke. Not the same . Thinking a contact high will be enough, well you know better it's never enough in any capacity for any self respecting junkie. You'll be hitting the ATM machine. Actually I'm talking about me of course
@Knucklez That's what you have too work with, never thought my habit would last into my 60s. I went 16 years once not using. But i drank a lot of beer and pot. Did the hep c thing, and thought one line won't hurt. Now I'm firing that shit and trying to kick again. At 65-1/2. I'm not trying to tell you what to do just telling you what i did. Peace be with you man
@Knucklez Then you are foolish. You know not your worth. And I am wasting my time with you here. What are you losing besides yourself and your soul? You are young and have much to learn on life.
I am foolish. The most foolish person on earth probably. You are definitely wasting your time on me, without a doubt. I’m a lost cause. The longer I’m alive the more I learn how truly worthless I am@PoetryNEmotion
@Knucklez Get help. I cannot help you, hopeless one. I cannot MAKE you know your worth. Others would love to have the breath you have as they are dying. You are foolish.
SW-User
i have new habits which i have to practice on to make it old but i don't have the money